You Must Contact V Australia ASAP

I got an email from this morning about my upcoming trip to Australia.

“V Australia has made a change to your itinerary.”

Sounds serious.

“You must contact V Australia as soon as possible”.

I will!

“Failure to contact V Australia regarding this change could result in complications with your trip.”

No. This is a three-leg, 24-hour trip with a baby. I definitely don’t want any “complications”.

The first thing the V Australia robot asks for is your frequent flyer number.

It’s 10 digits. I have to find it in my inbox, and then switch between my inbox and the dial pad while I type it out in three parts.

The first time I type it out, it says wrong number.

I retype it. Using the same number.

It works this time.

The first person I speak to (after minutes on hold), says — I’ll have to transfer you to our bookings department to work out what’s happened.

I’ve given her my full name and date of birth as well as my reference number.

The line is bad. It takes us three times to get the reference number right because she’s hearing my C’s as V’s.

She transfers me.

I’m on hold for a long time.

I get to the second person.

She asks me all the same verification questions.

She asks me to explain the problem again.

She’s hearing my B’s as V’s.

After she goes into my account to investigate, she comes back with the answer.

— You need to call your travel agent.

— It’s not a travel agent. I booked through Kayak.

— Yes. Sir. That’s the same as a travel agent.

I read her the exact text of the email.

— I’m sorry Sir, but you need to call your travel agent. I can’t give out that information.

I’ve been on the phone for a quarter hour by now.

— Can you please just let me know how the itinerary has changed?

Long pause. Sigh. Typing in the background.

— You really need to call your travel agent. But this one time, I can let you know what’s gone on.

— OK…

— Your arrival time was originally scheduled for 10.30am.

— OK…

— And it’s now been changed. Your updated arrival time is 10.36am.

V Australia has made a change to your itinerary.

You must contact V Australia as soon as possible.

You do not want complications, right?

My 14 hour flight is landing six minutes later than originally scheduled.

That’s cool.

But what about giving me back the twenty-six minutes of my Thanksgiving weekend you stole making me Tough Mudder through your incompetence to get that useless piece of information?

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