Siri has become a very efficient digital assistant. In the past, you had to ask a passenger to help you navigate on a road trip or outing, but now you can just tell Siri, “Find the nearest gas station,” and she’ll give you turn-by-turn directions. You can also use Siri to schedule meetings, check the weather, get sports scores, or dig up movie trivia. Overall, Siri is pretty great!
But Siri and other digital assistants can be confused by extra words, including polite language like “please” and “thank you”. Siri is most effective if you use succinct, declarative commands and leave out any pleasantries.
Siri, tell my brother I’m leaving now.
Siri, navigate to the nearest Chipotle.
Siri, wake me up at 9 tomorrow.
Even though I would never give commands that sound like this to my assistant, spouse, or child, I have learned that this is the most effective way to communicate with Siri. So I don’t ever say “please,” lest I confuse Siri. And even though I could say “thank you” after she has completed a request, it feels forced/bizarre because I know she’s not listening anymore.
Hopefully my evolving Siri habits are no big deal. Hopefully I will continue to be polite with my wife, coworkers, and daughter. But I can’t help but wonder whether my frequent interactions with Siri—all of them devoid of politeness—will eventually affect the way I interact with people.
I also wonder about how the next generation will be affected. They will grow up hearing their parents giving orders to human-sounding assistants, who will comply promptly and without protest. Kids will themselves start giving orders at age 3 or 4, on iPhones and iPads borrowed from Mommy and Daddy. Will they become accustomed to giving commands, and if so will they realize that the way we talk to Siri isn’t the way we’re supposed to talk to people? (For those who think that kids would never confuse Siri with humans, note that in the second sentence of this paragraph, I referred to Siri using the relative pronoun “who”—which is supposed to only be used for people. I didn’t notice this until after I’d written the sentence, and you probably didn’t skip a beat when you read it. Apparently we are already thinking of Siri in human-like terms.)
I’m not saying the sky is falling, and that the next generation is doomed to insolence and ingratitude. Only time will tell what effect—if any—mannerless interaction with digital assistants will have.
But why venture down this path? Why not give Siri an optional “courtesy mode” that expects us (and our kids) to preface requests with “please” and follow with “thank you”? A few ideas:
Courtesy acknowledgement: Siri listens for “thank you” and follows up with an appropriate response (“no problem!”). This would make it feel more natural to say thank you than it currently does, since you know that she’s not listening and won’t respond if you say it.
Friendly nudge: If you don’t say please/thank you/etc. frequently enough, Siri nudges you to be more polite (Siri: “and what do we say…?”)
Throwing elbows: If you don’t heed the nudges, Siri holds back the requested information (Siri: “I’d be happy to navigate for you, if you don’t mind being a little more polite”)
“Courtesy mode” wouldn’t be for everyone—plenty of adults would find it to be unhelpful or even annoying. But for those of us who would like to be more polite—or at least for our kids to be—a “courtesy mode” would be a welcome addition.
