My Best Friend

My best friend doesn’t know that he is my best friend. He just thinks that we play squash once a week. We met a couple of years ago now — well I say met, my squash coach at the time asked him to play me. He was expecting a bit of a pushover on court but instead he got me — the angry bird with a mean back hand and lots to say. I’m not sure he had a choice about whether to carry on playing me at squash, I just expected him to keep turning up each week. And turn up he did in more ways than one.

We like to warm up before a game so our conversation starts in the gym. We have covered every topic known to mankind including those he would prefer not to. He has listened to my impressive, loud and angry rants — desperately trying to interject with rationale observations during a brief pause and generally failing. He has sat quietly next to me whilst I have sobbed with sadness and wailed with hormones. He has ducked when I have thrown my racquet across the court in temper and bounced of me whilst trying to get to a shot. He has held his hands up in defence after accidentally hitting me with his racquet, to protect himself from my wrath. He has taken my verbal abuse when he gets a ‘fluke’ shot (which happens a lot) and taken the ‘fifth’ if he wins and I’m not happy about it.

He often goes off after our game to think about the things that I am upset about so that he can offer better advice the next time round. He never minds if I mess him around with changing the time or day of games and always tries to make me see the best in everything. He has no idea of the level of support, kindness and wisdom that he has given me over the years, he vastly underestimates himself. His life hasn’t always been easy yet he is not resentful, angry or sad. He gets up each day and simply makes the best of it.

He is the real deal, a genuinely authentic guy who is funny, kind and generous. He is my best friend but he just doesn’t know it.

Nik Davis has a mission — to enable people to achieve the ‘seemingly impossible’ by being whole and re-defining what makes us all a true success. Nik wants to normalise ‘telling it how it is’, to share our failures as well as our successes and to show our vulnerability whilst sharing our compassion. In pursuit of this mission, Nik writes openly and honestly about her challenges, in the hope that others facing them will not feel so alone.

Nik is a management consultant by trade. Her comfort zone is order, logic and applying analytical tools to solve problems. She is also an observer of life and an eccentric with a passion for fashion and interior design. Nik is a mother to 3 children, wife to another equally eccentric individual and owner of 4 dogs, 3 guinea pigs, 2 rabbits, 2 hamsters, 8 chickens and 2 ducks.

After returning to her career after taking time out with her family, she found that her perspective and priorities had changed, as had the world she was returning to. Nik decided to carve out a new place in that world and also mould some of it to fit her too.

Nik often talks about finding ‘The Third Way’. It’s a philosophy about life, having a personal life as well as a career, making money and being socially generous, being logical and sensitive, living by the rules of a society but not being afraid to challenge or change them, inspiring others to feel good but not for your own ego, giving rather than taking. Theses are just a few of the things that spring to mind when she unpicks what the third way means for her.

It may be, that there are other individuals out there who have a similar view on life or feel a similar motivation to write about their experiences, to peel back the superficial layers we cover ourselves in and tell it ‘how it is’. To find their ‘Third Way’ and change our normality to something more authentic and real to live by. If so, Nik hopes that you will find her slightly mad ramblings interesting, amusing and inspiring.

Nik runs a facebook page and discussion group (nikdavis) as well as posting regular updates on her website and linkedin feed. Please feel free to join the conversation — the only rules are respect and kindness for each others thoughts. I look forward to meeting you all, albeit remotely.

Originally published at