What makes you happy? This is something we have all agonized over forever. Is happiness just about ‘feeling good’? Alcohol and drugs make people feel good in the moment. But, it feels odd claiming they bring me actual joy. What about being rich? In this case, get back to me when I get my inheritance. This is funny, because there is no inheritance.
So.. what makes YOU happy? brings YOU joy?
I have learnt to find my joy in the more subtle things in everyday life. These are some of those things:
Smile Backs
I am a shy and awkward guy. You SHOULD know that by now . Despite this, due to some unexplained phenomena, I have a tendency of making eye contact with strangers on the street. Probable causes for this could be reading too many self-help books that claim this to be a confidence booster, brainwashing by parents to be friendly with everyone, or just another Nilabjo idiosynchracy. Regardless, I usually follow the eye contact with a smile.
SMILE .. what a weirdo!
The smile and the eye contact happens throughout the day: morning, afternoon, night and late late nights. This has nothing to do with my state of mind. It is more of a reflex.
Nine times out of ten, the smile is met with an indifferent gaze. People have a lot on their minds. They could be engrossed in an NPR podcast or Malala’s audiobook; or trying to figure out how to get more followers on Instagram; or worried about climate change or nuclear war.
Yet, there is always that one person who returns my smile with a smile! Usually, the smile leads to an extra second of eye contact, our eyes light up, and then we go our separate ways. Call me eccentric, but this makes me happy. You can never underestimate the power of a smile. It could bring you just seconds of delight or change the complete outlook of your day. Knowing that a subtle gesture like this can make someone smile, which results in making their day better, brings me immense joy! The joy is extra if the reciprocating stranger is a beautiful girl.
Pancakes with the right CSF
In the past few months, I have developed an obsession with Sunday brunches. Something about the idea of preparing an elaborate breakfast and getting to enjoy the meal instead of rushing through it is very relaxing. The highlight of the brunches are the pancakes. I don’t claim to be a connoisseur, but the best pancakes need the right ratio of crunchy, soft and fluffy (CSF). This might be a piece of cake when you use a conventional mix. But, it is more challenging because I have to use dairy & gluten free substitutes. As a result, the CSF suffers, and I have to resort to eating sub-par pancakes. I had tried various recipes or adjust the ingredients to achieve the optimal CSF, but to no avail.
This changed on November 19 2017. I was in the process of making my usual brunch. NPR’s This American Life was playing in the background, and I was captivated with the episode about the strange journey of a polygraph operator. Due to the lapse of attention, I put the yogurt for the fruit salad into the pancake mix.
‘Oh shiiiiiiiiiit!’
Instead of throwing the mix away, I chose to give the mistake batch a shot. Much to my pleasant surprise, these pancakes had the best CSF so far! I added some maple syrup and lactose-free butter, and they were restaurant quality! I remember cherishing every fork-full. This was one of the most satisfying meals of my life, and this was all because of a mistake. It makes sense, since some of the best inventions resulted from a mistake . Due to the blessed slip-up, my pancakes have had the ideal CSF, and have certainly made my Sundays more joyful.
Sing Like No One is Around
Music is my life. I try to listen to music whenever I can. If you see me around walking to the bus or heading to the supermarket or catch me at a urinal, chances are my headphones are in and Spotify is on. If a favourite song comes on, I do exercise my restrain not to belt out the song in public. The world doesn’t need another wanna-be rockstar. I am too insecure to put up with the potential embarassment. As a result, I just mouth the words or bop my head as an alternative. But, sometimes opportunity to rock out in public presents itself.
A week ago, I was coming back home from a night out. It was 2 in the morning. As I was walking down the street a block from my apartment, Fix You by Coldplay started. I’ve always had a special bond with the song. The song is about having to comfort someone inconsolable, and that makes me emotional. Since no one was around, I got caught up ini the emotions and began singing, out loud, ‘When you try your best…”.
The first couple minutes of the song are slow: organ and words. But, it crescendos to an uplifting guitar riff and Will Champion’s excellent drumming! In the music video, as the song builds up the energy, Chris Martin starts running on the street and heads to the stage of a massive sold out arena show. With no one around, I lost all my inhibitions. I imagined myself on the stage in front of a sold out crowd, air-drumming and singing the chorus ‘Tears stream down your face..” as the crowd of 100,000 sang along. Actual tears did start streaming from my face. I was completely immersed in the song.
As the song ended, I snapped back to reality. There was no band or a show with 100,000 people. It was just me, myself and I on the street in front of my apartment. I couldn’t stop smiling as I opened the door and got on the elevator. Moments like those are complete bliss!
