I catch your scent in an old sweater and there you are, riding out of the darkness.

Coming forth from the misty nothingness of the graveyard.

There’s silence and then a valencia montage of memories from numerous Insta-worthy dates.

That time I was your wingman,

Helping you score with that pretty girl at the coffee shop

Even as I wiped her face right off your mind

With the deliciously destructive night we had after.

That time you called me at 4am to tell me that you loved me

And I was snoring fast

Smack in the middle of your grand proclamation

That time we talked away the cold winter night

Swapping stories beneath a solitary street lamp

At a godforsaken railway station.

All these memories fan out before me

Like a neatly spread out deck of cards.

And it’s funny because my card is missing.

That card on which I gambled everything away,

The card with that one moment that brought us where we are

That one moment when everything started to collapse upon itself.

That time when I was at my worst

And you not at your best

And we just couldn’t let things rest.

That night our love knew no forgiveness.

It wasn’t kind or patient or quiet.

And years of perfect memories despite

Our love, in that moment, just wasn’t right.

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