The Torchbearer
I recently went on a one-month trip with my boyfriend and his friends to Southeast Asia. It was truly an unforgettable experience, but we ended up breaking up with him (on good terms) a day before our return. He has some special qualities of a content creator that I admired at first, but I think a bit differently after the breakup.
Our relationship, which I hoped would last for the rest of my life, lasted only 4 months, but I still evaluate his skills to be a better content creator myself.
Here I am, trying to write the ups and downs of an important quality of a good content creator based on a true story with my ex from our trip to Southeast Asia.
My ex as a PADI advanced open water diver
One fascinating aspect of his style is that he was always someone who puts himself out there, 100%. He owned anything he participated in, even for a short period of time. Let me give you an example from our latest trip.
When we landed in Koh Tao, Thailand, we felt the promise of an extraordinary experience learning to dive. So, we enrolled in PADI courses, earned our advanced open water diving certification, and explored the underwater wonders 13 times across 3 different cities during our month-long adventure.
To me, it was only a fundamental level of experience. I surely loved it, had a lot of fun, thought I could plan my vacations according to good diving spots around the world from now on, but nothing much. He, on the other hand, got carried away. He took it very seriously, subscribed to a diving app for his Apple Watch Ultra (which actually made sense), started to read everything on the PADI app, began discussing technical terms as if he were an instructor, and called himself a torchbearer in the end.
It’s great that he dedicates himself immediately and feels like he is now one of the guardians of the ocean, but isn’t it a bit ambitious at this level? I mean, when is he going to dive for the next time when we get back home? In 6 months, best-case scenario?
I am sure that at this level, the Pacific Ocean doesn’t need me as a torchbearer, who knows just enough to survive (and remove her mask, and signal turtles and some cool fishes) underwater and lives in Europe.
My ex as a true influencer, or maybe not
In the boat back home, he was chatting with another diver from Nuremberg, Germany. He goes, “Oh really, I lived there!” How long, asks the other. 3 months, he replies.
I knew that he was stationed in Nuremberg for a short period back then. He didn’t pack up all his stuff and move out from his home country. So, does it count as “living,” really?
I start thinking about why these examples are a bit embarrassing to me. Because I believe that doing something for a very short period of time is not enough to “influence” people (which is something I also find amusing in many content creators). Yet, he believes that he can influence people with the knowledge he has so far.
He doesn’t care; he just owns it, he shows it, while others were waiting for the perfect conditions or learning more and more…
He is one step ahead.
I am not sure if this is something I could ever do, but I realized that without believing in yourself, you will never have satisfactory success.
So, he believes he is a torchbearer, he acts like one, and leaves no space for anybody to argue, so everybody treats him like one.
It is perfect!
Me as a coward
In the meantime, I am the one who is waiting for better conditions, yet I want to be seen as much as he is. I tell myself, “Your days are gonna come,” but trying to reach enough perfection to put myself out there is not easy. I am missing out, but at the same time, I don’t want to be like him. I can tell people I live in Brussels because I literally live here. I packed all of my stuff and moved in here.
So, what I need to do to start working on my projects without sounding or looking too assertive is to work really hard. It may not be perfect, but I can certainly try my best.
“Don’t wait until everything is just right. It will never be perfect. There will always be challenges, obstacles, and less than perfect conditions. So what? Get started now. With each step you take, you will grow stronger and stronger, more and more skilled, more and more self-confident, and more and more successful.” Mark Victor Hansen
I now know that if I am putting myself out there, I need to do it today, with all of my imperfections (including the ones that led to the breakup with my boyfriend).
It is never too late!
So, please don’t hesitate to follow me on social that is yet to be worked on 🙂
