Please Let’s Not Use The Weinstein Mess to Fuck Up Black Women
I promised myself that I would stay out of the Weinstein debacle since the consistent heaping of testimonies from home and abroad — is proving to be more than I can accommodate based on personal trauma.
Now, I do have something to say — in reaction to the update concerning actress Lupita Nyong’o — who detailed her experience with Weinstein in an op-ed for The New York Times.
The difference with this particular confession is rooted in how explicit it is compared to the others. Nyong’o eloquently divulges every encounter without holding anything back. As a result, the reader almost feels like they stumbled upon a diary — that wasn’t meant to be public.
Perhaps that’s why Weinstein felt the need to defend himself against the embarrassment of being at the mercy of a woman who is no longer ashamed to admit what happened to her.
Sexual harassment has zero to do with the degree of “prettiness” or “desirability” or “Whiteness” — and everything to do with power and how it can be exerted with forcefulness beyond limits — until the stretch is abruptly rerouted.
The reaction to Weinstein’s statement where he recalls a completely different version of events — has been met with disappointment and displeasure by the squad of social media — that have been following recent developments — quite closely.
Yes, it’s kinda whack that Weinstein decides to refute the allegations of a Black actress, when he appears to endorse the White actresses who also shared their harrowing tales.
What we can’t do — is turn this into a subject of how Black women aren’t appealing enough to be molested. We can’t perpetuate this notion that White women are the ones that men will proudly admit to abusing — but Black women are so gross — that when it comes to experiencing that same honor — we still fall short.
Obviously, the reason why mostly White actresses are stepping up to the altar of confessionals is because they dominate the landscape of Hollywood. They’re the ones that are permitted to be celebrated ingenues and this status gives them easy access to Hollywood moguls that have the right to choose the next blossoming flower — based on her fuckability.
This in no way minimizes the unfair treatment of the victims — it’s just stating the facts in order to explain why a Black actress stepping forward — would incite extra scrutiny and a litany of theories about why a powerful White guy would feel the need to dispute his alleged attraction to her.
I choose to accept his denial as his discomfort with how intricately transparent Nyong’o chose to be, which I’m speculating came from her need to either be jarringly forthcoming — or painfully silent.
I don’t however, equate Weinstein’s rejection of his victim’s testimony as the universal “fuck you” that’s organically assigned to women that look like her.
We can’t use this mess to further fuck up the decency of Black women by implying how we can believe that a Black woman as beautiful as Lupita could most definitely compete with her White counterparts — in the race of women that men typically vie for — in the great wide open.
As a Black woman — it’s offensive to see the tweets that on one hand support a woman who bravely stepped into a spotlight — none of us would ever volunteer for — and then the path takes a dark turn as users stress how Black women are always shunned for not being worthy of anything — including the respect they don’t need to steal from assholes.
Weinstein’s admittance to something he did — will never come — and even it does — the damage is done. Lupita Nyong’o stated her truth and the only one who really knows what went down is Lupita.
Then there’s the nagging evidence that White women only speak up for Black women — when there’s the need to voice how we’ve been supposedly belittled by a complete freak show. How fitting that they’re the ones pointing how “the only Black actress” to come forward — ends up being the target of a public dismissal.
What’s the motive behind this rallying cry for a Black woman that has not only spilled her guts for the world to view — but is also in the uncomfortable position of being singled out as a liar — by a man that basically spent his entire career with his pants around his ankles.
Black women deal with enough without having to conclude that we’re not attractive enough to be publicly claimed as a victim. The mere notion of that is beyond sickening and leaves me to wonder how far we will go to distort the value of Black women.
As with everything that goes viral — things tend to get out of hand very quickly. From the battle of hashtags with hefty price tags — to the sparring among strangers that swear their allegiance to the quotations of the minute.
I’m trying to stay afloat — but almost lost my footing when I peeped the destructive shit emanating from all corners that seem to indicate my worst fears.
That’s why I can’ keep quiet.
I’m a Black woman and even though I’ve historically acknowledged some of the challenges that come with that disposition — I will not tolerate the echoes that keep chanting how much more worthless I can be — when sexual predators refuse to validate their tendencies towards women that look like me.
It’s fucked and embarrassing and we need to stop. Effective immediately. We need to get it together.
FYI — This was finally published after an agonizing surrender to join the circus that showcases certain groups wanting to be a part of a “movement” in a way that’s not completely genuine. And after witnessing the appalling analysis from people that have no idea what they’re talking about because they simply don’t know.