Pet Peeves

Let me say this now, before someone I love/care/about/respect does one of these and I feel bad for subtweeting them. Lol

Pet peeves:

• Liking your own status: its kinda gross, reconsider.
• When people say, “sorry for your lost.” I love y’all, but stahpit.
• Posting things/resposting things without a quick Google search. That celebrity who didn’t die, or died 16 years ago, but is making the link rounds. That post about the man who was “president before George Washington” The one with a picture. The one with a picture of a man who would have been alive and been president well before photography was invented. Hoteps need not enter in with ancient knowledge about the kemetic origins of the daguerreotype. I know we created civilization, but also hush. Even though, like most of us, I have a well-founded mistrust of “traditional” sources Google and Snopes are your friend. I love us enough to say, stop spreading misinformation.
• Hoteps and the Proteps that love them. Please find a seat, or a handcarved ethically sourced stool made in China from ancient African wood from the tree of knowledge.
• Littering. I HATE littering. I will judge you swiftly and with the force of a thousand side-eyes and all the black woman ancestors who don’t have time for the foolishness, if I see you littering. Keep your trash and growing carbon footprint in your car like a civilized human being.

• Jesus-as-chain-letter posts: I am not “ashamed of the gospel” or whatever, but also god is not a slot machine so no I won’t be reading or sharing to avoid the paddle boat to hell or so god knows its “really” real. I already tatted his name on it — he know its real. (Lol ‪#‎kidding‬ about the tat). Also applicable to political posts, and posts related to your causes.

• Posts that say: “I bet this won’t get any likes or shares because its not *insert Protep wisdom here*” — you’re right, the end is nigh, and I’m not sharing your passive aggressive post because I’m too busy watching Scandal and plotting on Michelle Obama’s crown. Sorry momma.

*whew*

Thank you for listening. Lol