Is This True?
Revealing the Falseness of Your Negative Self-Image
Forrest Gump is my #1 favorite movie of all time.
Perhaps the reason why I like it the most is because Forrest is too ignorant to believe in his own limitations.
We’re all so smart — using our reason to justify why we can or can’t do something.
We see our current situation and decide that that is just who we’re going to be for the rest of our lives.
It is a false concept that we see as true.
So here’s an exercise to help you see that your negative self-image is actually false.
And if you can’t seem to see the truth for what it is, I have a method for you to think more like Gump so you can progress anyway.
The Facts
There are certain facts about you and life that are true.
If you failed an exam, you failed.
If you’re over the healthy weight limit, you’re overweight.
If you’re sad from a breakup, things are hard for you.
Is This True?
The problem is we often then identify ourselves with these facts, which turns out to be not true.
In these situations, when the negative self-talk is overwhelming, step back and ask yourself, “Is this true?”
“I’m a failure because I failed the test and have failed at many other things.”
“Is this true?” Have you ever succeeded at anything? Did you learn to walk, to read, did you ask out that girl or guy, did you graduate, did you buy a car, did you do something even when you didn’t want to? Yes? Okay so you have failed, but because you’ve succeeded at other things, it’s now false to label yourself a failure.
“I’m fat because I’m an unhealthy person.”
“Is this true?” Just because you’ve made unhealthy choices — perhaps a lot of them — does this mean you have to make more unhealthy choices? If you label yourself as unhealthy, you’ve given yourself an identity, which will cause it to self-perpetuate. But no one is, by nature, unhealthy. You could start eating healthy at any point in the future.
“Life sucks, so it’s always going to suck.”
“Is this true?” You’ve been hurt. It’s painful and you don’t see how you could ever get over that person. But are you always heartbroken? When you’ve gone out with your friends or have seen a beautiful sunset or seen another beautiful girl, did you momentarily forget about the person who broke your heart? Chances are, yes. So it is false that your life sucks in general. It just sucks right now.
If It Is True, Does It Serve You?
Most — if not all — of these negative self-identities are false when you really think about “Is this true?”.
But if you really can’t get yourself to say that it’s not true, then you must ask yourself, “Does it serve me?”
This is the Gump technique for people who aren’t ignorant enough to ignore their own perceived limitations. I find self-delusion is a good equivalent to ignorance.
You think you’re a failure? Okay, well does that serve you? If so, how? Can’t think of an answer? Then why still think that way? What, are you just gonna peter through life feeling like a failure and do nothing? Okay. Have fun.
But it doesn’t have to be like that.
I mean, you could at any time, just ignore that stupid voice, ignore reason, ignore your past, be delusional — and just go forth thinking you’re not a failure.
Instead of accepting yourself as a failure, you could just learn from your failures in order to get better. That sounds like a better life to me. But hey, I’m not you.
Does it serve me to think I’ll always be unhealthy or that life will never get better?
Man, if it does, I’d love to hear it.
Conclusion
You do no one any favors — least of all yourself — by accepting a diminished version of yourself.
The diminished version of yourself is an illusion. You are delusional. Self-identifying with events is a delusion. I could it here all day and chop all your excuses at the knees with evidence in your life that is contrary to your negative self-belief.
So if you’re going to be delusional, why not switch to a delusion that you’re a good person — a person who eats unhealthy sometimes but who also eats really healthy at other times, who tries hard and fails sometimes but wins other times, a person who’s life is hard sometimes but amazing other times?
I mean, the upside seems way better.
Facts are true. Self-identifying with the facts is false.
Say the faults for what they are — temporary set backs that you learn from — and move on.
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This article is Day 23 of the 30-Day Fishbowl Series
You can start the series by clicking HERE.
