LSD and Meditation.
I have been meditating wrong all along. All this time I believed you just sit still and close your eyes. Turns out that alone isn’t enough.
I took some LSD and I decided to just sit still and do nothing for an hour. Something which is pretty hard to do considering how much brain activity LSD induces. I sat there battling my thoughts feeling like nothing is happening but I didn’t care. It was more that about just meditating to me. But at the end I was frustrated.
Discipline.
The following day I did it again. But differently. Instead of just sitting and letting my thoughts roam around, I brought myself back to the moment by focusing on my breathing. For an hour. I came out more disciplined than ever. Feeling like I can take on the world.
I still feel that way. I decided to take a break from social media for a month or so. I realize not a lot of people can do that. I’m on day 5 now. Not too shabby. It goes much deeper. I’m looking to find joy and happiness in life without needing some sort of validation from people. Call it a retreat and call me a recluse. It’s just me and my thoughts for this month. I’ll see the rest of the world in October. By staying disconnected from social media I am denying my brain the dopamine it craves with the hopes that it gets used to not relying on dopamine to feel good about life.
I don’t write as much as I used to.
And I don’t know if that’s a good or bad thing. I mean.. one has to have a life outside of writing, one needs to stay connected to life, that makes it highly recommendable to sometimes take a break from writing and live. I never stopped thinking about it though. Like a girlfriend I love but see too often for my liking. I think about her when we’re apart but I know for the relationship to work I need to give her some space. A lot of relationships are killed by overstimulation and this isn’t going to be one of them.
Go on ✍🏽
It’s a beneficial relationship though, the one I have with writing. It makes me feel good about being able to articulate myself better in conversation. The words I would usually stumble on stay at arm’s reach but that’s what reading does to you also. They are so intertwined it’s eerie; couple them with meditation and you’ve got yourself a perfect recipe for growth. But I haven’t much to write these days, I’m enjoying observing life so I guess this is my conclusion then. Even though at the moment I hardly have anything to write about, I still enjoy writing. I love that I can look at my previous writing and say with confidence that I have improved as a writer. I was probably the most arrogant writer you have ever come across. With no reason I might add. At that time. But I’m better now. A lot better.
✍🏽
