Patriarchy Princesses And Their Love Of Benevolent Sexism

Incygneia/Pixaby

The revolution will not be televised, it will be tweeted, snapchatted and even instagrammed!

Feminism and equality are the orders of the day in many places worldwide. And in the places where people use culture as an excuse to avoid treating women better, feminism is creeping in whether patriarchy likes it or not. Those pesky women are rather good at getting inside your “culture” and dismantling your arguments with a few well-placed lines. They even demand better treatment while showing you the error of your patriarchy loving ways and won’t back down.

Just in case you missed the memo:

You can’t treat women like crap anymore.

You can’t tap your female co-worker’s butt or any other part of her body without getting reported to HR. And should HR try to let you off the hook for “doing what boys do”, you’d most likely end up on social media where hordes of feminists are going to make you wish you learnt what consent meant. You can’t even gently correct your wife with a few slaps without getting arrested for assault and battery these days, thanks to those bitter man-hating feminists. You can’t rape, harass or treat women like they are less anymore. Because feminists are making sure you don’t get away with upholding the patriarchy.

Can you imagine those conniving women got together and decided they didn’t want to be treated like property anymore? The nerve!!

Many men have this reaction. Some understand the ways that patriarchy hurts men too and want to change the system. Men upholding patriarchy because it benefits them isn’t news. What I want to talk about are the women who are the gatekeepers of patriarchy: The Patriarchy Princesses.

Patriarchy Princess (noun): a female human who upholds the patriarchy for the sole reason of being in the male gaze and enjoying adulation from male folk (of the same species) for standing up to bitter feminists. See also: Pick Me.

You may be thinking:

But patriarchy affects us all and dismantling it should be the goal of every human being.

This isn’t the goal of the patriarchy princess. Oh no, she upholds the patriarchy firmly; carries its pillars on her back to make sure it is standing firm all for the small benefits she reaps from the system. Benefits? Yes, tiny benefits like:

• Getting treated better by men who deride other women (especially feminists) as bitter, angry and manless.
• Being showered with attention from men who see women as being the weaker gender and invariably, less than men.
• Being attractive to sexist men who dangle the carrot of marriage whilst wielding the stick of patriarchy. PS: that stick hurts them just as well.
• Generally getting crumbs off the table where they ought to be sitting as equals.

Before you scoff and write me as a bitter feminist, ask yourself if you haven’t seen these women who will use whatever means to defend the atrocities committed by men. These women are everywhere, they are the ones that will:

• Blame any woman who has been sexually assaulted. They ask questions like what was she wearing, why did she go there etc. as if to excuse the violence a woman just suffered at the hands of a man. Basically re-victimising an already traumatised woman.
• Shout not all men on social media when people discuss the violence men subject women to via hashtags like MenAreScum, MenAreTrash, MeToo and TimesUp. They know quite well what these hashtags represent but are often trying to be mischievous for the virtual pats on the back they get from sexist men.
• Slut shame any and every woman for being in control and enjoying their sexuality.
• Marriage shame other women once they get married.
• Police the way other women speak about feminism, sexual violence and domestic abuse. They will tell you to be nicer when talking about it so that men will listen.
• Scoff at feminists and call them angry and bitter all the while enjoying the benefits that previous feminists have fought for and won.

The list goes on and on. Patriarchy princesses love the benevolent sexism doled out to them by men for bashing feminism and upholding the system that keeps women oppressed. They are like sponges who soak up the dirty water of benevolent sexism while getting dirty and old from frequent use.

The funny thing is they are in the same boat as other women. The patriarchy princess still can’t understand why she gets treated horribly by men even after a full day’s work of bashing other women. At the end of the day, she is still slutshamed, harrassed and assaulted like other women.

Benevolent sexism is still sexism.

What many gatekeepers of patriarchy don’t understand is that at the end of everything, you’re still a woman. And to these sexists, that’s all you are even though to them you are slightly better than other women out there. It doesn’t guarantee you better treatment from all men.

Till patriarchy is dismantled, patriarchy princesses will be out here pushing against the wheel of progress all in the hopes that they get picked and are treated better.

What use is getting a piece of cake and being grateful when half the cake is rightfully yours?

The best way to ensure that every women gets better treated is to dismantle the system that treats them badly. While feminists are raising awareness and trying to eradicate patriarchy, please stop telling them to stop being angry or to be nice about it.