How can you love your neighbor if you don’t love yourself?

Nora Jacques
Aug 19, 2017 · 3 min read
True love starts within.

Many moons ago, long before I met my husband, I was in love to a man who we’ll call Dream.

Dream represented everything that I wanted in a man. He was tall, handsome and successful, even as a student. We met on campus, and spent the next few weeks and even months, slipping in and out of the friend zone.

I was head over heels for him. I thought about him all the time. He could do no wrong, everything about him was wonderful. Even when he did break my heart, I forgave his bad, and cherished his good.

The problem was, I didn’t love myself. At the time, I spent every waking moment numbing mental and emotional pain through smoking marijuana and diminishing my body.

In diminishing myself, Dream could not even see me. I was blocked in my ability to truly shine, because I couldn’t see the brilliance of what I brought to the table as a woman.

In my mind, (and thank God, I’ve evolved) love was outside of me, and I needed him in order to have beauty, worthy, significance. The truth however was that I couldn’t love him, nor could I be lovable, if I didn’t love myself.

Shannon Evette says, “When your inner-garden is well watered, you don’t have to chase the butterflies. The beauty of your garden will inspire the butterflies to come to you.”

Too often, do we neglect ourselves. We neglect our health, our homes, our families, our spirit, our souls, our bodies, our minds, yet we expect our health, our homes, our families, our spirit, our souls, our bodies, our minds to deliver when we need them to.

Strong bodies require exercise. You must eat life-giving nutrients so that your mind can be in an optimal state, so that you will have the strength and energy you need to work and play.

If you want your spirit to be uplifted and joyous, you must take the necessary time to remove past hurt, guilt, shame, fear and attitudes and behaviors that no longer serve you from your life. Spend time in nature, take time to heal and process and learn and grow. Give yourself a chance to thrive and prosper and reach the fullness of who you are.

Our homes require daily rituals of cleaning and blessing. Our families need love, service, time, gratitude and the constant purging of mistakes, flaws and wrongs through forgiveness.

If we put love in, we will get love out. So, how do you suppose you will love someone else, if you haven’t taken the time to receive and embrace the love of the Father?

How can you share joy, if you haven’t healed from depression? Could it be time to step back and give yourself the needed space to blossom?

Many of us are still hurting. Yet, we continue. We continue ignoring the pain, until the pain is crying so loudly that we must stop.

Out of the heart flows the issues of life.

So, if you haven’t taken the much needed time to invest in loving you, can you truly LOVE?

How do you love yourself? The same way you would love any one else. Through, kindness, through compassion, through forgiveness. By spending time alone to give yourself the things that you’ve always wanted some one else to give you. Don’t wait for anyone to do it for you. YOU do it for you.

I want to invite you to join my mailing list to receive inspirational posts and get updates on my new book, Soul Cry.



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