There are both little boys with feminine interests. In fact, I’d say most young boys are interested in typically feminine things, and only later learn that that is not considered appropriate.
There are also little girls with penises who know from the time that they are very young that their genitalia do not correspond to who they are. They are not the same as the little boys who like playing with dolls and listening to Beyonce. These people grow up in agony over every single change that happens to their body. They dread hearing their voices crack. They dread seeing their jawlines become defined. They dread watching their body and facial hair slowly come in, one by one.
Biological sex is more than just parts. It is chromosomes, hormones, genetics, and, ultimately it is really only useful from a medical standpoint.
I know women face the things you cite; it’s a huge issue, and it needs fixing. However, when a man realizes the woman he is about to rape is trans, she will often end up dead. So have some compassion because cis women are not alone in this struggle.