Love

I almost forgot to write an essay today.

I usually write on this platform as soon as I arrive at the office, but I have a training scheduled in the morning so I haven’t got a me time to tinker with my laptop. After the training I helped people carry lunchboxes from the company gate to my office. Three individuals have generously offered to order food for the department, so I graciously accepted.

Now that my belly is full, I can finally sit in front of my laptop and write.

In this afternoon, I am wondering how love would feel like for other people. I mean, what are the physical sensations experienced by their bodies so that they can conclude that it is a sensation of love. Because I think my body is feeling something that can be called love.

It happens yesterday, when you expressed to me that you regret saying all those things when you were angry. To which I said I have already forgave you, I have no feelings of contempt or desire to seek vengeance, truly.

But your sentences after that disturbed me. You spoke about how I didn’t ruin your life, and your life was already ruined.

In that moment as I read your passage, it felt like I saw someone not loving herself. Blaming herself for all the unfortunate events that has befallen on her life.

In that exact moment, I wish I can hug you to let you that know you’re wrong.

You must never talk to yourself like that. You are a good friend, treat yourself as the closest friend of yours. Would you speak to your friend that their life is already ruined?

So I chose my words carefully and sent it to you.

Afterwards, there is only silence as you have not replied. But my body feels, light. It feels like taking a deep breath until my lungs are filled with air, and smelling a dash of mint in the air.

And I thought to myself, is this how love feels? Maybe this is the feeling of loving someone without expecting to be returned.

It is a good feeling.

I just hope I didn’t offend you with my words. I hope you are doing fine.