An Exploration of Social Media: My Interview With A Social Media Baron
By Neil Turkewitz
Me: I’m sitting here with one of the titans of Silicon Valley. A kingpin of the information economy. I will refer to him as SV. Welcome SV, please explain your vision for the audience.
SV: So here’s the deal. I’m going to build a park — not an actual park with trees and fresh air, but a virtual park that you don’t need to leave your house to visit. And I’m going to invite the entire world to come to it. And here’s something really cool — not only is there no admission price, but there are all kinds of free things. I’ll provide the electricity, and take care of everything necessary for people to enjoy themselves in the park — write the software (or sometimes just copy it from others, but let’s keep that between ourselves, okay?) that allows this magical universe to operate, do what I can to make sure you meet other people that you’ll find interesting based on what I know about you, offer you goods and services that will liberate you from the boredom of your ordinary life…oh wait, did I say that out loud? I didn’t mean to suggest you’re bored or ordinary — just that I will be providing a cornucopia of entertainment the likes of which you could never imagine (and, in some instances, wish you or your children could forget but that’s a story for another time). And did I tell you that this is all for FREE? I know, amazing.
Me: That sounds incredible, please tell me more.
SV: Happy to do so. Indeed, I haven’t even gotten to the best parts. In this fantastic universe, you don’t have to be your normal boring self. Sorry, there’s the “boring” thing again. I don’t mean that you’re boring, only that in real life you are trapped inside the body that you must carry around with you until you die. In my world, you can be anyone you want to be — freed from the artificial constraints of the laws of nature, physics and mankind. Be your real self, be anonymous, or anything in between. Everything and anything goes. Indeed, the more outrageous your character, the more attention you are likely to get. And did I mention that I will be providing all of this freedom for FREE? Why, if you manage to get enough attention, you may even make money!
Me: Is it okay if I ask a few questions?
SV: Sure. Fire away.
Me: I’m having a hard time understanding why you would go to such lengths to build this fantastical kingdom of the mind without getting paid. Did you inherit billions and just wanted to give back to the world? What’s in it for you?
SV: Next question please.
Me: But I really don’t get it. Please?
SV: You wouldn’t understand. It’s super complicated and has something to do with algorithms and other things that I myself don’t understand. Anyway, you’re missing the point. This is all FREE for you. What happens on my end shouldn’t be relevant to you. Didn’t your parents teach you about proper etiquette and how to show appreciation when receiving gifts?
Me: I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to offend you. It was careless and stupid on my part to try to understand your motivations. Please accept my apologies.
SV: That’s okay. I’m a giving and caring person. Let’s just avoid such ill-mannered insinuations from here on.
Me: I’ll do my best. You mentioned that in your magical kingdom of the mind, that you would ensure that I’d meet other people that I’d find interesting based on what you know about me. But we don’t know each other. What could you possibly know about me?
SV: (audibly snickering) Good question, and this is an amazing part of the story. You see, everything that you do in my kingdom, or in adjacent kingdoms, leaves a trail of information about your interests, the identity of your friends, what you like and don’t like. You don’t even need to bother filling out any forms to tell us about yourself. Our experience with forms is that people either lie, or don’t really know themselves, or both. By tracking all of your interactions, we get a much truer sense of you than you could possibly imagine. Indeed, one of my friends over at another magical kingdom likes to say that our very business model relies on knowing what you want before you know you want it. Wait…did I say business model? Please strike that from the transcript. I meant that our ability to create the ideal environment for the free exchange of ideas and information relies upon our understanding of who you really are. And by that, I don’t mean “who you truly are“ in a fixed material way in the manner of speaking in the world governed by the weary giants of flesh and steel, but in your virtual representation in which you are entirely free to be who you want to be.
Me: That sounds a little creepy. In your world, I’m under constant surveillance so that you understand what I like and what I don’t like, and so that you can liberate me from the constraints imposed by privacy that, in your way of thinking, interferes with my ability to be free?
SV: Now you’re getting it! Did I mention that all of this is FREE? And you won’t notice the surveillance…I mean, the machine learning, at all. So don’t think about it. Just sit back and enjoy the conveniences of a frictionless world where all your needs are taken care of without even needing to ask. And be proud of your role in helping to inform the Artificial Intelligence that will continue to expand these marvelous freedoms.
Me: This interview is getting a bit long, so let’s get to the final question. It seems like you might be inviting trouble by providing a world in which people’s identities can be masked and in which they’ve invited to be as extreme as possible so as to attract attention. You’ve organized every part of this ecosystem and, based on some reading I did to prepare for this interview, operate it on proprietary software using non-transparent algorithms, the impacts of which may not even be known to you. This magical world will undoubtedly invite some unsavory…even dangerous types. It will surely cost you a fortune to ensure that a certain modicum of good conduct is observed in your kingdom. How can you afford that without charging admission to your kingdom?
SV: Here’s the thing. We believe in freedom, not policing. We build the world. What people do there is none of our business. Yes, we may monetize every act, but who are we to judge? We’re not gods, only kings. We refuse to subject everyone to our particular moral judgments. And here’s the fantastic part — we’ve ensured that the laws in the US and around the world don’t hold us accountable for the conduct of our business…I mean, for the conduct of the visitors to our kingdom who are enjoying the freedom to express themselves without filters or intermediaries.
Me: Thank you very much for taking the time to walk me through this. While it sounds very exciting, I don’t think I want to live in your world. How do I exit?
SV: That’s funny. You should have told me from the outset that you were a comic. I might have set you up with your own channel. And don’t worry — I don’t need your permission. Did I mention, I believe in FREEDOM.
