Reactions to the Reasons Parents give to get you married.
- A,B, and C have gotten married you should too. — But with whom? With A or B or C? They all seem interested for a threesome. I am not able to decide.
- You have reached your age, you should get married. — *Pretend calls old age home.* Looks like someone reached their age.
- You will find it hard to find a suitable guy if you reach a particular age. — Refer to #2. Hey Mom, Dad! The same holds true for nurses too! Let’s do it earlier.
- You are settled now in your job, guess what time to get married. — No Mom/Dad, I am a career man/woman. Wait some time. Just this one office affair. I promise, it is the last one.
- Find a husband to do your activities with. — Start laughing awkwardly and sheepishly. Nothing better than an awkward parent. And then say ‘So cute. Never change.’, and leave the room.
- We will be retiring soon, you should get married now. — Yay! Let’s book a world cruise with all that PF money. I promise I’ll find someone there.
- You can do Trekking and Running together. How nice would that be? — As nice as the last time the two of you did something together and didn’t end up fighting. Which is basically never.
- Do you love anyone? Why don’t you tell us? Is he/she of our caste? — Yes Mom/Dad! There is this girl/guy in my life, who likes me a lot, but the Indian Government is yet to feel the same about it. Do you hear the shaking sound? It’s of a closet about to open, and we don’t want that, don’t we?
- We should have got you married long back. Look at your friends aren’t they happy? Don’t be a pessimist. — Yes. And I should have gotten that b**bs/d*ck tattoo on my forearm too. Water under the bridge.
- Look at you, so tanned. Why don’t you take care of your looks? Stop roaming around till your marriage is fixed. — Well then, night curfew should be extended. Also, please transfer 20 grands for the skin care products I don’t need but totally can afford. And no I ate all the curd, honey already.
- Why don’t you come with us for weddings? How will people get to know you? — Free food, dance floor and hot dudes. Hell yeah. Let me show you my twerking skills. Give me tips on improving them. Also, is there a bathroom, because I might need to go in between my food trips to balance out all the money you spent on the gifts.
Taken from Vini Katyal’s post here. The struggle to retain our freedom and sanity continues!