Struggling to Move On: A Journey of Stagnation and Insecurity in Content Writing Role
While content writing presents its challenges, and the journey often feels unrewarding, I’ve persevered through nearly nine years in this field. Despite the difficulties, I’ve remained committed to this path, even though it’s difficult to comprehend, even for myself. The career has felt stagnant, with income levels remaining unchanged, and the job descriptions within the company unclear and ambiguous.
“But why have I stayed, though?”
I frequently ask myself this question and often find myself at a roadblock, unable to easily answer it. However, various thoughts swirl in my mind as I ponder this dilemma. These reasons may have contributed to why I’ve been unable to move on for far too long.
Unable to Move on from the Comfort Zone
In my current company, despite the lack of growth, appreciation, and acknowledgment I could receive, I feel overly attached — not to the company itself, but rather to the friendships and the environment it provides.
Having been here for nearly nine years, I’ve developed a sense of belonging; it’s almost as if I own a part of it. While I could easily criticize the company, I hesitate to sever ties because I’ve grown accustomed to the family culture here.
I should maintain a professional relationship with the company, recognizing my role as an employee and its status as my employer. However, over time, I’ve developed a deep sense of attachment that clouds my judgment. I’ve grown accustomed to the culture and relationships here, making it difficult to imagine the same level of connection elsewhere.
Despite my loyalty and dedication, the company doesn’t reciprocate the same sentiment. Consequently, I find myself stagnant, unable to grow and evolve as I had hoped.
And that is why I can’t easily move on from this company, despite my desire to do so. The familiar environment, the friendships, and the sense of belonging here act as significant barriers. I’m afraid of losing the sense of family I’ve found within these walls, and I doubt whether I’ll find a similar sense of connection elsewhere.
Fear of Change
I must admit, fear of change plays a significant role in my reluctance to move on. I fear stepping into a new environment where I may not find the same camaraderie among colleagues. There’s also the fear of not being able to express myself freely without worrying about hurting others. These fears, among others, have kept me anchored in my current position, despite my longing for growth and new opportunities.
I also fear that I’ll have to endure the struggles of being a beginner once again in a new company, much like I did when I first started here. The challenges of navigating unfamiliar territory and proving myself from scratch weigh heavily on my mind. While my current role as a senior also presents its own set of struggles, there’s a unique sense of vulnerability and uncertainty that comes with being a newcomer — a ‘newbie,’ if you will. It’s a daunting prospect, and one that adds to my hesitation about making a change.
Unclear Where to Set Next Career Path
As I mentioned in my previous article about the challenges of content writing, my role has often extended beyond just writing content (read also my story: Content Writing is not an Easy Career). The diverse array of tasks I’ve been assigned has left me uncertain about where to focus my next career path.
I find myself at a crossroads, unsure of which direction to take. Should I dedicate myself to mastering content writing, or should I explore roles in digital marketing, where my skills in PPC could be valuable? Perhaps I should consider becoming an SEO specialist, given my penchant for delving deep into analytics. Alternatively, the role of a content strategist appeals to me, as I enjoy conceptualizing strategies that could enhance marketing efforts.
I aspire for a career role that is not only personally fulfilling in terms of achievement but also financially rewarding. However, I frequently struggle with choosing the specific career path to focus on. I find myself investing countless hours, weeks, and even months into researching various positions, meticulously examining their responsibilities, and determining if I am a good fit for them.
Insecurity
Insecurity is one of the struggles I encounter when I’m considering applying for a new job. After staying in the same company for so long, I realize that my confidence in my portfolio hasn’t grown as much as I’d hoped.
Instead, I often feel insecure about my competence compared to those who have gained experience across different companies and tasks, even if their tenure in each role is just a few months.
I wonder why I struggle with this feeling. Is it because I fear that recruiters might perceive my lack of career progression in my current role as a sign of incompetence? Why haven’t I been promoted to a content manager or digital marketing role after nearly nine years? Does it reflect poorly on my performance or the value I bring to the company? These thoughts contribute to my insecurity, making it challenging to compete in today’s job market.
Perceived Obligations
As a working wife and mother, I find myself juggling multiple responsibilities. My income plays a crucial role in supporting my family, especially with financial commitments like our home loan and other expenses. There’s a perceived obligation weighing on me to continue working to ensure our financial stability and support my husband.
However, the thought of leaving my current job and stepping into the unknown terrifies me. I fear the uncertainty of whether I’ll succeed in a new environment or if I’ll be able to maintain our income levels. The fear of potentially losing this financial security holds me back from exploring new career opportunities, despite my desire for growth and change.
As I reflect on my journey, I’m reminded of the complex emotions and challenges that have defined my experience in content writing. While the road ahead may seem daunting, filled with uncertainties and insecurities, I’m determined to confront these obstacles head-on. Despite the comfort of familiarity and the pull of perceived obligations, I recognize the need for growth and change. It’s time to break free from the shackles of stagnation and embrace the unknown with courage and resilience. By acknowledging my fears and uncertainties, I take the first step towards charting a new course — one filled with possibilities, growth, and the promise of a brighter future.
With a mixture of trepidation and excitement, I’ve chosen to share my story here on Medium — a platform that serves as a gateway to the world. Through my words, I aim to offer a glimpse into my journey, the challenges I’ve faced, and the lessons I’ve learned along the way. As I take this first step towards introducing myself to a wider audience, I invite you to join me on this adventure of self-discovery and growth. Together, let’s embark on a journey of exploration, reflection, and connection, as we navigate the intricacies of life and work. Let’s connect!
