Longing…
Intense longing mixed with nostalgia.
Intense longing for the known.
Nostalgic memories filled with the known.
I walk around with a blank gaze.
Eyes downcast.
Running the memories of the known over and over in my head.
Again and again.
Wondering where it all went wrong.
I look ahead and I see the future shrouded with uncertainties and I find myself fighting not to run back to what I know, the known.
Fighting against myself.
Just me against me.
An internal battle with no winner in sight.
A longing so deep, my heart aches with each memory.
A longing so deep, It stirs my forgotten emotions all over again.
A longing so deep, I find myself clenching my eyes shut tightly with each memory.
A longing so deep, I find myself clutching onto the memories tightly.
A longing so deep, that makes my eyes water and my fists clench in response.
Almost like a reflex, I’d say.
Memories running rampant In my head.
Not particularly good memories, but memories are memories all the same.
I thought you were on my team.
But clearly, I was fighting the world and myself all alone, on my own.
Me against me.
Me against the world.
Longing for the known…