Day 11: Transitions

I think I need to rant a little bit.
 
I have been relatively successful at work. For my age and experience, I have been put in some pretty tight situations where product getting shipped out the door depended on me.
 
I had been working as an intern under my boss, who is an electro-optical engineer. He is amazing, and I learn from him every day. He is my mentor.
 
Then, in July, I was hired on full time as a salary employee. Since then, there been been some changes. Changes that I don’t think I like.
 
I was slowly transitioned from being my boss’s protege to being part of a different group in the building. This group prides themselves on being different from the rest of the company, and tends to be quite exclusive. I’m now a half-breed. Something in-between both groups.
 
On one hand, it was exciting and a new challenge to get on the team. However, there is a certain culture that hasn’t really sat well with me. I haven’t been able to quite put my finger on it.
 
Everything the group does is collaborative — whether the person knows anything about the subject or not, they are expected to give their input. I find this weird. I don’t know everything, so I don’t want to speak when I have no idea what I am talking about.
 
Don’t get me wrong, collaboration is a great thing. But, I think there comes a point where certain decisions can be made because they were made by a professional that knows what they are doing.
 
There is also a social element that I haven’t been able to crack. The exclusivity of the group is a cool branding, but I’m not particularly friends with any of them. The ones that I am friends with want out — I’m pretty sure of that.
 
The group also seems like somewhat a venture of the vision for the company, and they don’t make a ton of money. I’m not exactly proud of the work that they produce, and it seems some of the tools/solutions they use are somewhat dated and a bear to use.
 
My cubicle was moved closer to this new group. I miss the nuances and conversations with my mentor and the group he is a part of.
 
All of this contributes to a feeling I have had for the past several weeks. I want out. I’m not comfortable where I am at, and I want to go back to the way it was. I still need to be mentored.
 
This past week, I had a meeting with my old group. The one where I was always under my mentor. It was great. There were so many brilliant minds in the room. I felt really important to still be a part of the group.
 
I can’t really find any positive reasons, both socially and career wise, there would be to staying with this new group. I just don’t fit. I think I will have a conversation with my engineering manager about it this week.
 
If he can give me some good advice on the path that I should choose, then I will listen. Otherwise, I think I should go with my gut on this one. Things just aren’t working.
 
Jordan