It’s hard! [English article] /My personal feelings (don’t have to read)/

Oko Khosbayar
Sep 5, 2018 · 2 min read

The most pressuring, depressing month has come, September. People start getting accustomed to their old job, habit from a vacation. Young people dive into school life which is scary for some people. And for a group of people, new beginning will open its door.

It’s getting scary to login in to my social accounts, especially facebook. You’ll see some fake news, disappointing sad local news, and negative contents usually. But I think it’s only for my country. By the way, Mongolians have been informed that they are the top facebook user among Asia and Pacific. I’m thinking of giving in facebook soon, because it makes me more miserable, stressed and lazy, I have observed.


Recently I wish to have born in 80s so my childhood will be 90s and would have been adolescence in 2000s which things were much simple and people were good-mannered. Now looking at my country, current situation of personal life, people these days, it’s all fucked up. I mean, it doesn’t make any sense to me. All these years have passed, yet we are still behind so much developments, mentally particularly. I wish people didn’t their mental health granted. Even if we are hurt, mentally drained, what we are taught is to be strong. Come on, when you are in a need of help, when you don’t know what to do, how can you keep going?

Used to dream of becoming a artist when I was kid, but have been shut down my mom. Thought of doing so much and making contribution to the society when I was like 18, 19. But have been told that I was wrong by people near me. And now when I want to live the live I want, I think I can’t. What’s holding me back? There is something holding me back that I can’t even refuse to do it.

It’s been hard for me these days. I mean it’s not actually me who makes things worse, it’s people who is dear to me, make it hard for me. Tired, drained, broken, hurt and cannot keep going this way. Sometimes think of going away far and start a new life. But guess now is not the time.

Sometimes people who are dear to you, hurt you the most. They tend to lead you in a way you don’t want.

Oko Khosbayar

My stories are to #inspire you.

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