A Tribute to my Father: Journey Through Grief

I had seen coffins before that of my father. So it was not that much of a big deal seeing another, only that the issue was I did not understand the reality of the death of my beloved father until after he was no more. Writing this tribute to my father who died on the 4th of September 2007 brings back a full drum of memories to drink from. Is it the memory of me sinking into deep sadness and depression, using other things to substitute? Or that of hearing people talk about their fathers in secondary school with me having little or nothing to contribute –obviously because daddy was no more? In writing this, I wondered what I wanted to really focus on since I had already talked about my father last year with a long post that I can’t believe I typed — The Depth. You can read it here
https://www.facebook.com/OlolaAfola/posts/10214315990761921?__tn__=K-R
So if you have read from the link above, you will know that my father was a good man, too good to be gone –still, it is what it is and I am thankful that he lived a legacy. On legacy, I checked in after posting the tribute last year and I was humbled by the comments some people wrote about my Dad. Things I did not even know about. For instance,
“The memory of the righteous lives on forever. I remember he placed undergraduates in the church on a monthly stipend of #10,000 as at that time & he used to head straight to church from work during the week. I can also remember when he joined us in weeding the church & we quickly thought it was odd so we all tried to restrain him, his reply was that I should get my own cutlass cos we are all running our heavenly race differently. He died some months after that. Continue to rest in Gods bosom In Jesus name”
Or this
“Beloved, your dad cannot be forgotten. I was his pastor before I left for the US. In fact he was still in the church before he passed. Your father was dependable. For a young church (Fountain Of Power), your father was one of the persons that helped move attendance from 24 to about 400 in a year. How do you forget such a person? Sleep on brother.
How about this
“My professional colleague am short of words, Bro Ogeye encouraged me so much after NYSC ,he showed so much love in our dept then T&P ,he is an embodiment of everything that is good, his death then was a colossal. Nobody in the church then and now has ever shown true love like your dad,strict,loving and a great lover of God. Surely we will see at resurrection morning.
These particular comments touched the deepest part of my heart, and I was challenged to reflect on my life. If I were to die today, what kind of legacy do I want to be remembered for? There is this quote below:
“Live each day as if it were your last ‘cus one day you’re gonna be right” Ray Charles
…but the meaning of this is weighty. Reason being that we usually forget to remember that we could be eclipsed in a twinkle of an eye, that we could die any minute. And when we die, all the people we leave behind will have only our memories to cherish. What kind of memories are those going to be? As I remember my father today, to say that I am not sad is grossly inappropriate because I’d only be lying. But, in all things, I am thankful that this journey has been a worthwhile one, with me still growing and learning everyday.
To those who are hurting right now, having lost someone or something that matters a lot, it is my hope that you find PEACE in Christ Jesus. I have found that he is the only one that gives blessed peace beyond human understanding. This is one of the major things that I have learnt and still hold on to. To my father, till we meet again…Keep Resting!
Love,
Olola — Daughter of Babatunde Olukayode Ogeye
