Advice From a 20-Something-Year-Old

1.) Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff

I know most of us have heard that before, but have you ever caught yourself spilling a glass of water and getting upset because of the mess? I know I have, but I realized that a small mess (or big one) is only taking up a fraction of your time to clean up. I know that most of the small things won’t matter to me in a year, even days from now I might not even remember the small events that caused me to get so worked up in the first place.

2.) Realize When You are Wrong

After years of losing friends, ruined relationships, and drama, I realized not everything that caused those things were other people's fault. I used to put blame on everyone but myself. An old friend I lost because they were boring, became a friendship I lost because I didn’t try to connect with her enough. I realized if things weren’t my way they were no way. I refused to be wrong, but as time passed I realized that the nasty breakup that caused me months of sorrow and grief was because I acted irrationally. The reason I dropped out of college isn't that my ex was pressuring me to move it was because I spent all my time being with him not focusing on myself. When you finally realize you can be wrong and sit there and think about the things you did wrong, you start reacting differently, and most importantly apologizing to people you value.

3.) Don’t Spend Your Money on Useless Things, But DO Spend it on Experiences.

The newest iPhone, name-brand clothes, the cute home decor you don’t need, the list goes on and on. When it comes down to it many people are struggling financially, especially my generation. Rent has gone up, food prices are outrageous and so is gas. So spending what little fun money you have on useless stuff is making it so you can’t live your life to the fullest. But when you spend your money on experiences like concerts, festivals, and activities you can make memories that last a lifetime. When I am laying on my deathbed I want to be able to say I had fun and experienced life to the fullest, not have a bunch of stuff no one will want or care about.

4.) Listen More

I mean two things when I say this

  1. Sometimes when people are venting we tend to try to relate to what they are saying. By doing this it can make people feel like we are not validating their feelings, so instead of trying to relate listen to what they have to say and ask if they want advice, or just needed to vent. Let them know you are there for them.
  2. Listen don’t just hear. This is something my best friend has always said to me. I have a habit of just hearing the words people are saying not truly listening to what they have to say. I don't give my full attention so I end up asking questions that I wouldn't have to if I just listened.

5.) Introduce Yourself to Random People

This one is hard for me, I'm shy. But recently I was at a music festival camping, all of our neighbors were in their 20’s so I went outside of my comfort zone and introduced myself. The whole weekend was filled with games, dancing, and fun. I made so many memories, met great people, and have new friends from all over. My experience this year was so much fun because I extended myself.

6.) Learn to Say NO

Whether it is at a job or in your personal life, you need to be able to set boundaries and say no. You might not want to hurt someone's feelings or seem like a rude person but you will put yourself in positions you are uncomfortable being in. I had friends who would ask for money but never pay me back and I would never say no. I put myself through stressful weeks covering shifts for anyone who asked and not getting my own work done. So now I have boundaries to say no and I am no longer inconvenienced by things or uncomfortable in situations I put myself in.

7.) Never Stop Working on Yourself

You will never be perfect, that's okay. But if you think you are perfect, you're not, get over yourself. Always try to be the best person you can be and always work on your flaws. You will always make mistakes, and you will react badly to certain situations, but the best thing to do is to learn from your mistakes.

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Olyvia Cate

Olyvia Cate

As a young child I loved to read, and as I got older I started to love writing stories. My main goal with my writing is to help people but also to entertain.