Uncertainty

It is a disease to feel so unsure,
 about every tiny little minuscule thing,
 I’m hoping, no I’m praying it has a cure,
 relieving me from the pain this uncertainty may bring.

You grow up with a fixed vision,
of what life will be like once you leave school,
it’s a shame, and to be honest it’s cruel,
how different life is from what you see on television.

Ignorance is bliss,
and its true life was much easier before,
but as you grow up, everything you seem to have missed
comes crashing at you and you just simply can not choose to ignore.

You dreamed of living like royalty, like a queen
with a big house, a flashy car and a loving husband,
but in this whole fantasy,
you missed out the part in between.

The part that is possibly
the most excruciating chapter in life,
to me this period of pure uncertainty,
proves the crisis comes way before your midlife.

You realise getting a job really isn’t as easy as they made it seem,
you once heard unemployment was rising,
but the chances of you possibly falling into this category
definitely did not fit into your childhood dream.

That luxurious house you so vividly dreamed of living in,
seems so out of reach now
that when you think about it
the imagery is blurred somehow.

Your knight in shining armour — yes, where the hell is he?
Wait, could it perhaps be this cute guy in front of me???
Dear future husband, it feels like I’ve been waiting for you forever,
I wouldn’t mind if you made your move like now, or you know whenever.

But it goes much deeper and the uncertainty branches out much further
will our world ever know peace?
Injustice after injustice,
the conflicts just seem to increase.

We try our best, I try my best
to address each injustice and do what I can,
my efforts may go unrewarded
but I am sure of one thing, I will not rest.

I’ll do what I can, and see how it goes,
you can not fight this uncertainty,
it’s always there, with everything you do,
it’s a disease that eats away at you.

But maybe I can learn not to fear this uncertainty
and just take what comes as it comes,
face the world and it’s cruelness
and just wait and see what it all becomes.

-Ominoh.


Originally published at ominoh.wordpress.com on April 8, 2016.

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