the cliff of doubt
when making a pivotal change in life, emotions run in their own life cycles. one of these emotions i am examining today is: self-doubt
the three phases of self-doubt
one (the ascent):
the external (friends/family/even randos) disapprovals and approvals of your decision will prompt you to circle back to the question of “shit, is this a good idea?”.
if you answer more yes’s than no’s to that question, you will find yourself committing to this change which pushes you to the treacherous but crucial phase two.
two (the plateau):
the plateau of baseline skepticism in your own decision. on this plateau, you will meet the demons that can completely halt your decision. it is the most treacherous phase because you can remain indefinitely on this plateau by entertaining your demons (probably going mad) but if you continue in spite of these demons, you will find yourself at the cliff of phase three.
three (the drop):
congratulations. you’re here now. what’s it going to be? are you going to stay on the cliff and let your nerves get the best of you and return back to the baseline doubt. or will you jump?
when i went cliff diving the first time, i had to pick the tallest part to jump off, an amateur decision, but ignorance was bliss.
i remember looking down for a good minute, before i could let my nerves paralyze me, i took a step forward.
all i remember was my heart leaving my chest.
once i hit the water, all the self-doubt dissipated as to whether i could do it or not.
i did and next time, i’ll know how not to almost-break my ass.