The Mind That Never Stops Thinking

Every person’s mind never stops thinking. It is what allows us to continue to breathe after we fall asleep, for our hearts to continue to breathe. Now imagine what it would be like if you could not control when your mind would rest on its on. Imagine the lack of sleep, the lack of focus, and the lack of control one would feel. In my experience with being diagnosed with ADHD, this hypothetical experience is not so hypothetical. It is very real.

Most people thing of ADHD as hyperactive. It is so much more than that. Yes hyperactivity comes with ADHD but with that it comes with lack of focus, the inability to slow down one’s mind to be able to fall asleep. Now, this is just my experience with ADHD and I am by no means a professional, so don’t read this and think that you might have this problem. Everyone can be hyperactive. Its how much control you have over it, to me, that makes the case.

Living with ADHD is not as debilitating as living with a severe mental disability like schizophrenia or low-functioning autism, but to the individual that ADHD affects, it can be a handful. For me, I can’t focus on one thing for extended periods of time. My body cannot slow my brain down enough to tell it that it is physically exhausted. I can’t sit still. Just because you might have these same issues, doesn’t mean you have ADHD.

Living with ADHD has hindered me in many ways. Because of my lack of focus I would constantly be getting in trouble in elementary school. I was put on controlled medication at the age of 8. For those of you who don’t know, controlled medicines are those that are deemed illegal unless prescribed by a psychiatrist in regulated dosages. They are highly addictive and can cause serious harm if stopped cold-turkey.

My ADHD had caused me not to make friends with those who saw me as “different”. In some ways, it had caused me to be bullied by those who couldn’t or wouldn’t try to understand what it was that made me different. In many ways it has been an all around nuisance.

Today though, I am different. I was able to get most of it under control. I still take all natural medicines to help me sleep at night. However I am able to focus better in class and I can sit still for longer periods of time. I graduated high school in the upper part of my class and I now attend college. All these things seemed too unrealistic even 4 years ago when I started my freshman year of high school.

One of my high school teachers told us that psychology is not excuseology. That is the only thing that teacher ever said that I agreed with. The adivce I would give someone who struggles with a mental disorder no matter how severe it is, would be don’t let your disorder define who you are. Accept it as part of you and move on. Don’t let it hold you back from living the life you want to live.

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