On Defining What Works for Others...

Isn't it quite hilarious how easy it is, for us, to define the norms that guide other people's lives? Or how very comfortable it is to tell other people how best certain emotions are to be expressed? A couple of months ago, I had argued intensely with Benson- a close friend of mine. A colleague of ours had just lost a relative, and to my ultimate horror, was not saddened by it. Or rather, was not expressing her grief the way I felt it ought to. While I was strongly of the opinion on the need to express grief through tears, Benson, candidly negated my views. Till date, I am very glad he did; as it gave me fresh perspectives on how not to circumscribe certain emotions or limit them to certain expressions. People love differently, people hate differently. As a matter of fact, love, to me, does not come forth as the opposite of hatred nor is death, to me, the opposite of life. There are so many in-betweens with these dialectics. For this reason, I am no longer shocked when a friend narrates a gruesome experience, while laughing. Or when another friend sees the setting sun and cries.
