A Head On A Body

Don’t stereotype me.

A head on a body,
That is not my identity,
You forget my emotions,
The hopes and fears,
The dreams I never speak about,
The insecurities,
The feeling of being less than enough,
The people I call my own:
Family, the ones who bleed for me,
Smells of the places I have been,
Memories as tangible to me as my skin,
Scars, the weights I carry,
Bits of yesterday stuck to my heart,
The cracks in my walls,
Empty spaces nothing can fill,
The things I cannot take back,
I will not try, life cannot be rewound,
My victories, my letdowns, my secrets,
The voices in my head,
Whispering, screaming, crying,
The madness I contain every day,
And the one I cannot hold back,
All my loves:
The black, the white and the gray,
The ones I let go,
And the ones who will never leave,
You forget my stories,
The hunger, the thirst, the tears,
Nightmares,
Demons I barely keep at bay,
The prayers, I lost count,
I lost count years ago,
Faith, doubt, faith again,
I find my way, lose it and find it again,
Heart like a pendulum, swinging,
Between right and wrong, light and dark,
A mountain of offences,
The struggle I could not win,
A salvation I did not earn,
Grace, the reason that defies reasoning,
Yesterday, today and tomorrow,
The lifeline, a miracle called mercy,
A Life given for my life,
Heaven over hell: traded places,
Peace in the midst of war,
Because I have already won,
You forget what has been done for me,
And how it defines my being,
Past appearances,
Beyond a head on a body.

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