A theoretical approach for getting some interest in informal team activities from people who can’t be bothered. — Recently, a few of my work friends, all team leads, pulled me into what was supposed to be an easy conversation about team bonding. What it turned out to be, quite quickly, was a frenetic debate about the intolerable inconvenience of fraternising with co-workers in the name of making sacrifices…

Thoughts about distance. — I want to wake up, Not alone, Not to my thoughts, Not to the space that used to be ours. Can we eat together, Because I’m so used to waiting for you, But wait, you’re not here, Mealtimes are not the same without you. Life is mostly full, sometimes empty, But it’s a different kind of empty now, I felt myself become hollowed out, This heart that you once so easily filled.

Apparently, there’s more to work than showing up and appearing to do it. Shocking. — In the past year, I’ve worked from three cities, led a couple of projects and supported several more, slept well and slept poorly, made new friends, alienated some acquaintances and listened to hundreds of hours of music to keep myself sane. Through it all, I’ve been reminded over and over…

Do you feel all of it too? — Call it war, call it a struggle, Call it the hard work of living, Breathing is easy, It is what we do between breaths that takes a toll, And separates the brave from the cowardly, As the fears of living lead us to become (the best) (or the worst of)…

It can be a hazard, so take all the help you can get. — Like many things in Lagos, eating out can sometimes feel like an extreme sport and you should probably take all the help you can get with navigating the food scene in my home city. But eating is also personal, so feel free to ignore everything you’re about to read and…

Between two and the bedclothes. — It’s cold. Arms around, legs around, feet touching, hearts touching. It’s warm. I mutter, “Big spoon, little spoon, there’s no room in-between, big sky, little moon, the night and day are twins.” You’re laughing. Whisper into my hands, into your hands, into fingers intertwined, we’re almost one person now. Lips against nape, I smell hair, Taste skin, Want more. We’re awake now. Who started it, now we can’t stop, now ‘enough’ is a myth, then we’re falling back asleep.

An invitation to self-love. — You’re not alone, But only if you don’t want to be, You’re not alone, All around, there are people, do you see, Or do you look and see empty spaces in places where love is very much alive, Do you choose, to romanticise your loneliness, because somehow, You’ve glorified suffering…

On letting my guard down for my own good. — “How are you?” More often than not, my default response to this universal question is an equally prevalent one: “I’m fine.” (Popular variations include “I’m good,” “I’m okay,” and “I’m alright.”) Why don’t I give details, go deeper than the surface, maybe even pour my heart out? Well, I usually…

How did you become a second thought in your own life? — Opportunities are strongly persuasive things, particularly when they appear to be rare. We bend over backwards to seize them; they lead us to deprioritise parts of our life that we previously considered as vital; we may even reshuffle all our plans for them. We say we’re doing what we need…