Stop Picking My Brain!

EXACTLY how the rest of my group-mates were feeling! Hahahahz.

Hahahahaz. So we had our first ‘Serious Social’ and it was FUN & MEANINGFUL!

Catching up at The Art Space Cafe (cool place to check out everyone!), we did what all of us needed first — giving ourselves a direction and timeline, making sure we all knew where and how we were gonna get there with various schedules and assignments coming up, and knowing who was going to play what role and when certain milestones would be more relevant and realistic.

Getting that out of our system was good, but boring. It was just one of those things you HAVE to do, because without the structure, we would be like lost sheeps. The structure we have set in place was our shepherd, making sure we knew where we needed to go and roughly how we were going to get there.

And then we delved SLIGHTLY into the deeper part (because we only had 15 minutes before moving into Karaoke! hahahahz), and then the first reason came up over the unsettledness we had felt over the past 3 days — we have 2 ladies in the group and they themselves felt it might be due to their monthly cycles and the edgy feeling they get with that period. Well, reason accepted. Hahahz. As the only guy in the group (and one that has been working with a largely female-dominated profession), this was understandable. Something that i have to remind myself again the next month! :P

But we still felt that understanding our individual values would be essential to help us move together as a group, especially when we reach at a point where we are stuck. We stay firmed with our decision to go through this after Karaoke, even though my dear group-mates start complaining ‘stop picking our brains!’ (okay fine it was ME who was pushing the agenda hahahaz). Hahahahhaz. But we’ve gotta do what we’ve gotta do. If we didn’t know what made us tick, how can we stay true to building deep and meaningful relationships within ourselves? How would we know what importance we placed within our groups and the kind of behaviours we would to improve on that stems from our values and beliefs?

It started off weird at first, but we were REALLY LUCKY to find a nice place that didn’t have many people, much to our disappointment as our original intention was to check out the scene at Taboo at the same time! Hahahahz. But it kinda helped actually. We got to talk and listen to each other better, and this was the result of our session (in no ranking order within our value system):

Alvina values:
Time efficiency/effectiveness
Control & Power
Not taking things for granted
Polina values:
Sense of community/belonging
Sense of safety
Trust in relationships
Learning and exploration (growth and expanding horizons)
Gabriel values:
Sense of community
Putting the best effort
Learning and exploration

It was an interesting combination of values that we had within the group. Particularly, we knew that we had some work to do within ourselves as we conversed deeper about internal and external locus of control, self-esteem and relationship issues, and even how we gain greater self-awareness not just from books, but by putting ourselves in situations to test our limits and beliefs. I personally admitted to learning a lot experientially, and how it was about minimizing the casualties along the way, because it’s kinda like the design thinking process — diverging to different experimental extremes each time, and then slowly narrowing down and converging to understanding your core identity with more iterations each time as you reflect upon what you go through.

How we felt AFTER our Serious Social session that night! Hahahahz.

It’s kinda like the lean startup process — build (experiment), measure, and learn — just that, it’s all about applying to ourselves, in order to understand ourselves better and to validate assumptions about the world and ourselves. We have had some talk about how business models are actually really cool ideas to implement on ourselves for personal growth, but we haven’t actually used one on ourselves yet!

Perhaps there’s some gold in there that we could use, and to see where that leads us to in terms of the mentoring process if we applied interesting business principles and models to relationships, creating a blend of human-centric transactions for growth! ☺

So what’s next after finding out our values and knowing that we have to work harder to capture more insights about other values we might be missing out? We’ve decided that we are going to look at what are the behaviours that we want to improve on for the next 3 months, centered around our values/beliefs.

Hope we have something to share with the world on how that works out for us individually and as a team! We will also be reviewing our survey results as it has officially ended yesterday — so keep a lookout as we will soon be working on generating deeper insights together with our Cookie Monsters! Maybe, just maybe, the idea of human-centric transactions for growth based on business priniciples might end up being a useful idea! Hahahaz. But NO SOLUTIONS yet at this time as we don’t want to frame ourselves too early before knowing we have hit a FIRM SWEET SPOT on our ground!

***Fingers Crossed REAL HARD*** ☺

Stay true and warm,


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