This is the time to hold each other’s hands in the dark
A poem of love for a woman I’ve never met
Tre, they say the blind leading the blind is a combination for catastrophe
but then ‘they’ say a lot of things from the safety of their privileged and peaceful minds
we know some things we would rather not know
because DNA and circumstance have placed us on a path that is often overshadowed by the darkness of our thoughts
we are never alone
God dwells in this dark place too, with us
‘Whither shall I go from thy spirit? or whither shall I flee from thy presence?
If I ascend up into heaven, thou art there: if I make my bed in hell, behold, thou art there.
If I take the wings of the morning, and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea;
Even there shall thy hand lead me, and thy right hand shall hold me.
If I say, Surely the darkness shall cover me; even the night shall be light about me.
Yea, the darkness hideth not from thee; but the night shineth as the day: the darkness and the light are both alike to thee.’ -Psalm 139:7–12
So for a moment we felt like we couldn’t hear His voice
and anything resembling peace was drowned out by all the noise
of the mind
and all those voices of fear and death…all of them unkind
so we hoisted each other up and started walking through the darkness
you are never alone
remember that time my darkness scared and scarred me?
remember how unafraid you were as a witness?
remember how when I was too afraid, you called it out by its name then rebuked it?
how would you think that I wouldn’t do the same for you…
So we keep making our way through this dark tunnel
and you don’t want to see it even though when you open your eyes you can’t see anything
close your eyes for the time being and trust me to hold your hands while we pause for a moment
the path is yours to walk, so I cannot take the steps for you
I can walk with you
and after you are rested we can begin again
and if we listen intently we will hear the voices of those ahead of us, cheering us on to meet them
and we will reach out one hand each to feel the walls, to guide us along the way
and eventually, we will make it to the end
and what a sight it will be!
some light to replenish our weary souls
some respite to keep us going
and where was God in all of this?
in you, in me
deeply woven into every fibre of our being
unashamed and loving in our battles
and gently reminding us along the way:
you are never alone.
For Tremaine L. Loadholt.