Am I Happy or NOT with Single life ?
When someone ask me that “ are you happy being single ? “ I answered or will answer both YES and NO. I am happy being single because
- I enjoy the loneliness and can travel to different places in Bangladesh and I will travel whole world.
- I can write code and sit in front of my MacPro for as long as I wish.
- I can read some interesting blog and forum’s for unlimited time.
- I can do whatever I want; I am free to do anything.
- I run, debug, eat, pray, read and help people.
- I am not accountable to anyone. I enjoy a carefree life.
- I can save enormous amounts of time and declutter all my problems.
- I don’t need to share my bed with anyone.
- My happiness depends on me only not on any other/one.
- Nobody can give missed calls at midnight. So, I always have sound sleep.
- I live and lead my life with my own rules.
- I can spend more time to develop myself on self learning.
- I am emotionally strong and I avoid relationships consciously.
- I don’t need to impress someone; the only person I try to impress is myself.
- I always stay peace of mind because I lead a very simple and single life.
- I don’t need to check messenger, fb messenger or whatsapp continuously to see whether she has sent any messages or not.
- I don’t need to check my phone is it vibrate or not.
- I can spend more time on creativity.
- I can chase my passion without any problem.
But after walking miles after miles and/or after writing lines after lines of code, I have not breath left, I start to missing her. When I got any failure exception or got wrong answer/rejected by OJ after submitting my solution or Some thing/one make me hurt or after long time work when I feel tired or when I feel I’m passing too much busy times and no one disturb me, I feel the need for someone to console me. When I walk among the thousands of people in the busy street of city or When I stuck on fucking traffic jam on road, I feel the need to walk with someone. At the end of busy working day I return from office. I am exhausted, tired then make a cup of coffee and sit in the balcony. I feel the need to find someone.
I miss her a lot when most of my friends/mates bunk working hour to spend time with their girlfriends and I sit and try to solve a API issue or resolving some conflict.
Badly missing her when I write or read in Medium/Quora instead of messenger and feeling bad when I see I don’t have any pinned/shortcut messenger bubble in my Mobile home screen.
Really I miss her when I’m traveling by rickshaw at midnight in this city when I look back on my left side.