Children leaving home? Re-invent you

Julia
4 min readDec 30, 2022

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It can be a significant change when children are leaving or preparing to leave the home and parents are faced with the prospect of an empty nest.

In a survey done with Clark University, Dr Arnett found that while 84% of parents missed their kids once they moved out, 60% were glad to have more time with their spouse or partner or for themselves and 90% were happy their kids were independent.

This can be a time of sadness and uncertainty, as well as a time of opportunity and excitement. If you’re finding yourself in this situation, here are some tips for creating a new life when the children have left or due to leave home:

  1. Reflect on your goals and values. Take some time to think about what makes you happy and fulfilled, and start setting goals for yourself.
  2. Explore new social opportunities. Consider joining clubs or organizations that align with your interests, or volunteering your time to help others. This can help you meet new people and make meaningful connections.
  3. Seek professional support: If you’re struggling with stress, anxiety, or depression, it can be helpful to talk to a mental health professional. They can provide guidance and support to help you manage your emotions and improve your overall well-being.

A course such as ‘Your roadmap to getting the life you want’ found at https://oyolder.mastermind.com/masterminds/43479 can help you kick start your life by creating an action plan.

https://oyolder.mastermind.com/masterminds/43479

4. Stay connected with your children. Stay in touch through phone calls, texts, or video chats, and make an effort to visit them or have them come home for holidays and special occasions.

5.Embrace change. It’s a time of new beginnings, so look for ways to make the most of this new phase.

6.Seek support. If you’re feeling overwhelmed or struggling to adjust, it can be helpful to talk to a therapist or trusted friend or family member.

7.Be patient with yourself. It’s normal to feel a mix of emotions as you navigate this transition. Allow yourself time to adjust and be kind to yourself as you create a new and fulfilling life.

Taking care of yourself is an important aspect of creating a new life when the children have left home. Here are just a few ideas;

Exercise regularly: Engaging in physical activity can help improve your mood, reduce stress, and boost energy levels. Find an exercise routine that you enjoy, whether it’s going for a walk or run, joining a gym, or participating in a group fitness class.

Eat a healthy diet: Focus on nourishing your body with wholesome, nutrient-dense foods such as fruits and vegetables. Lean protein sources such as chicken, fish and tofu. Nuts and seeds are a good source of healthy fats, protein, and minerals like magnesium and zinc. Some examples include almonds, walnuts, pumpkin seeds, and chia seeds. Healthy fats like olive oil, avocado, and nuts can help improve heart health, support brain function, and reduce inflammation.

Make time for self-care activities: Self-care is about taking the time to care for your physical, mental, and emotional well-being. This could include activities like meditation, journaling, or taking a relaxing bath.

Get enough sleep: Adequate sleep is essential for overall health and well-being. Make sure to get enough rest by establishing a consistent sleep schedule and creating a relaxing sleep environment.

By taking care of yourself, you’ll be better equipped to handle the challenges and changes that come with creating a new life when the children have left home. It’s important to prioritize your own health and well-being in order to feel your best and be ready to tackle new opportunities.

Finding a new pair of shoes

Imagine that you’ve been wearing a pair of shoes every day for many years. They’ve become a comfortable and familiar part of your daily routine. But one day, you notice that they’re starting to wear out. The soles are thinning and the heels are starting to break down. You realize that it’s time to retire these shoes and find a new pair.

This process can be compared to the experience of becoming an empty nester. For many years, you’ve been used to having your children at home with you, and it’s been a comfortable and familiar part of your daily routine. But as they grow up and leave the nest, it’s time to retire this phase of your life and find a new path forward. Just like finding a new pair of shoes, it can be a bit intimidating at first. You might not know exactly what to expect or how to navigate this new phase. But with time and effort, you can find a new pair of shoes (or a new path forward) that feels comfortable and supportive for you.

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