Quitting Isn’t Giving Up
If you are an avid consumer of the internet like me, each day you are inundated with dozens of articles, success stories and motivation to pursue our dreams, live our best lives and connect with our entrepreneurial spirit. I admit that I too have been bitten by the bug, and believe that we all have the opportunity to live the best version of our lives if only we are brave enough to believe in ourselves and work tirelessly on our calling, if we are lucky enough to find it.
If you are also Nigerian, like me, you know that everyone has a full time or part time side hustle, and fingers dipped into any available pot (how about them exchange rates?) in order to create multiple income streams (We’ve all read how the average millionaire has about 5 - 7 streams of income, and surely we can’t “carry last”). It almost makes one feel ashamed to be content working their 9 to 5, and if not that, then it definitely makes one feel guilty when you hang the towel up on a hustle, almost like you gave up on your dreams and quit on the possibility of being all you can be.
“Be clear about your destination, but flexible about the route”
I am a collector of inspirational quotes; every morning at 9am, a new quote pops up on my screen from an automated service. They serve as reminders, as motivation, even as warnings. Sometimes they are able to shape my thoughts into words far more eloquently than I would have put them, and a lot of the time, the give me a new perspective, or reinforce my vision. I am reminded to be brave, to be strong, to be fair, to be kind, to change the world, to never give up, to be a doer, to be free from the constraints of our own mind, and many other such anecdotes. Armed with all this ammunition, it is hard not to feel ready to take over the world. All you have to do is have a purpose, focus on that purpose, align the universe to your dreams with positive projections and actions geared towards its manifestation, and most importantly, start, and never stop until you have seen your dream to its fruition.
But not enough light is shed on the many times that one has to stop, pause, take a breather, realign themselves, change our route, seek a different path, one that may eventually lead us to our same destination or set us on a different but better destination which we had never envisioned. And in order to do this, sometimes we may need to quit. Over and over again.
Quitting isn’t giving up.
Being a quitter is something that has always had a bad reputation: It denotes a lack of willpower, the inability to see things through, and is generally seen as a sign of failure. But the truth is, at some point in life, even the most successful people have quit at something. Only a very lucky few are able to immediately stumble across the right path to their destination without testing different waters first. Sometimes, quitting is the key to our success; It is just as important to know when to push through the obstacles in our way as it is to know when to hang in the towel, when tirelessly working at a job/ on a project/ on a new business that could be draining all of our resources, time, energy, money and affecting our mental health.
Remain absolutely committed to your end goal, but allow yourself the freedom and patience to explore and experience the journey to the finish line, which may or may not include starting over several times, changing tactics or simply traveling on a completely different road.
For many of us, quitting is scary business. It takes a lot of courage to leave what is familiar to the risk of the unknown, and it can have several implications, from financial, to the possibility of regret. I have personally had to quit several times, for various reasons. Sometimes, it was being stuck in a job with no growth possibilities or with good financial rewards but not aligned with my goals, sometimes I wasn’t ready to make required sacrifices such as relocation to a new country, and sometimes, my instincts told me it was time to gather all I had learned and move on and sometimes, I shouldn’t have quit at all. At each time I have dealt with various emotions and repercussions from this, such as feelings of failure, disappointment, disillusionment, thoughts that I wasn’t good enough or even worse, being made to feel like I wasn’t good enough. Despite these emotions, I have resolved never to dwell on what might have been but instead focus on the feeling of excitement of what is to come. The knowledge that the journey isn’t yet over, the wonder of new possibilities, being armed with even more skills, more knowledge, and more experience with which to broach new ideas, or tackle new challenges.
This does not mean that any time we are faced with hardship or difficulty, it is time to quit; everything we do in life will have its own unique road blocks.
However, if you are at a point where we recognize that something is no longer for you and no longer serves you, or you discover that life has a different purpose for you than the one you are currently pursuing, then have the courage to begin afresh, knowing that you are only making room in your life for the universe to align you with a new start, and you are taking the first bold step towards defining your own future. Always remember to be clear about your destination, your vision, the life you want to live, the person you want to be, the goals you have set out to achieve, but to be flexible about the route that will get you there.
We are more likely to give up when we spend too much time or money or energy hammering at a failed idea, than we are when we are open to trying new methods as a way to move forward.
