I Have Found My Balance!
Happy New Week to you. I hope you had a fabulous weekend.
When was your last birthday? What was the feeling like? I'm talking some days or hours before the birthday; were you super excited? Nervous? Or just plain indifferent?
So yesterday, 17th May was my birthday, and I superbly felt indifferent. Don't get me wrong: I am grateful for life and all God has given me. But you see somehow I was not concerned with celebrating it, or not. I just wanted it to be as ordinary as possible. No fanfare, no pressure or unnecessary drama. Just me, doing the every day things I do.
Well, other people had plans for me, so it was not an ordinary day. Lol. But why would I want an ordinary birthday celebration? Why won't I get all worked up with my unmet expectations for life? Or even think about the many future plans I have that have not worked out. Have I even considered my age and the fact that I haven't gotten even half of the things I aspire in life? Somehow, I wasn't even disturbed.
Calls came in; lots of calls. Her Royal Sweetness booked a surprise birthday cake and all. Family members around the world all played their part to spice it up. I am grateful for all these, and more.
But have you thought about why this happened, why I was able to maintain my cool and make my birthday as almost normal as possible? It's simple. I have found my balance. This begs for the question: what does balance mean?
We won't be using the dictionary to understand the term 'balance' today. I will however try to explain it in a form that justifies and expantiates on the goal of today's post.
Balance is my state of indifference. It is the point of not being bothered by inanities. It is the stage where I am not disturbed as to whether or not I am on the same level as my peers; it is maintaining my sanity inspite of the many noise around me. It is keeping my focus irrespective of the counts of challenges and difficulties encountered on the path of life.
It is definitely not laziness or pride. It is just sheer trust and belief that, although you are not where you hope to be, even though you have planned, prepared and taken the necessary actions at the right time, that it can and will get better, and so long as there is life, 'there is hope'.
A lady who we will call Adeola once lived in Lagos, and you know when she was 25 years old, she started buying and storing different items that she will wear in her husband's house: shoes, dresses, bags, slippers etc. It was funny. But she kept gathering these items. Now guess what, the husband did not come until 20 years later. She got married at 45 years old! Those same items she gathered for years were thrown away - they had become obsolete.
If you do not purposefully choose to enjoy your present while planning for the future, you lose a large chunk of the future in the present. Imagine not enjoying those colourful wears just because you want to use them in the future.
So many people lose their present in expectations of the future. That you haven't gotten someone to marry does not mean you should waste your time now. That you have been seeking for a job for the past 6 years or more does not mean you should give up on God or even choose to end your life.
In my final year as an undergraduate, one of my course mates died. Two years after graduation, another died. Seven years after, another died. I am still alive right? Therefore, it is my responsibility to choose to live to the fullest as long as I am breathing.
Truth is, I might not have gotten to the very pinnacle of the futuristic plans I have. Do I have the right mindset, yes. But I haven't climbed to the point where nations can read or listen to the message I have on the inside, but it doesn't stop me from enjoying my today.
A lot of people have entered depression because they have not been able to achieve all they have planned out; they have given their very best, but it still doesn't work out as planned. You have kept yourself as a lady for so long, but only the very worse of men keep coming towards you.
Folks have ended their lives midway because of how life has treated them. It's even possible you are facing these challenges because of the wrong choices you have made. Truth is, it really doesn't matter. Whether you made the mistakes or not, it should not be a reason why you will lose your present.
Forgive youself and move on. Let go of the past and enjoy your now. Your being alive is enough reason to prove that God is not through with you yet. One of the fruits of depression is self doubt. Now you begin to doubt your ability to move forward. You basically doubt everything. Nothing seems true to you any longer. It is even possible you are doubting all I am saying now. But let's see what God has to tell you in Jer.29:11
"I know what I'm doing. I have it all planned out--plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for."
Did you notice that God mentioned that He does not have any plan to abandon you? He cares for you too much to leave you to dry out. He went further to say, He will "give you the future you hope for".
Change your focus. Why should you keep crying over all you have lost? Have you lost your job, virginity, time or money? Has your life savings gone down the drain because of a bad decision you made? Have you pushed off people who you should keep close? Did you lose that admission because there was no money to pay the fees? Take your mind off the past. Get excited with your expectations.
I think a better topic for this post should be, "enjoy your today". I know because of the various challenges and difficulties facing you, this might be hard. But as much as lies within your power, enjoy your today. Be grateful for the little things. The fact that you are alive. You can stand and talk. You can smile and eat. You can walk and sit. These little things matter. You might be a cleaner in an office, or a clerk behind the counter. Or maybe an assistant to the assistant to the clerk. It doesn't matter. Take out time to find your balance.
Be futuristic, as discussed last week. But find your balance. Imagine getting to your future wealth with a wrinkled face and worn out body. Take out time to rest and reflect on your past, present and future. Don't live in the past or the future. Be excited over what you expect to see in the future; and let that excitement drive you to move forward. Enjoy your now. Enjoy your balance.
I have found my balance; how about you? I will see you on this page again next week.
I call you blessed forevermore.
I love you, and there is absolutely nothing you can do about it.
PS: Thanks for the birthday wishes and prayers guys, I don’t take them all for granted.
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