After 20 days of using twitter — I discovered something strange

I have been on Twitter for almost two weeks now, gained over 60+ followers, and engaged with over 60 people. During this time, I realized something interesting.

Photo by Clay Elliot on Unsplash

Don’t you think it’s strange that sometimes people we don’t know on social media can offer more support than our own loved ones?

I literally just posted a question the other day and got busy with work. My notifications are usually off during office hours, so when I opened my mobile app later, I was stunned. There were so many comments with people sharing their unique perspectives, experiences and suggestions. I even got my first ‘retweet’.

Then I started wondering, how is it so easy to share my small wins with strangers on twitter than sharing them with friends and family on Instagram? Is it really true that the real judgement actually comes from people we know?

My curiosity led to me this article:

Why Do We Care about Other People’s Judgments?

For many of us, we fear others will judge us for the things we judge in ourselves. We internalize critical thoughts like:

• You don’t make enough money.
• You should be married by now.
• You have no idea how to run your own business.
• You’re not good enough.

When you tell yourself these nasty lies, it’s easy to believe everyone else is thinking them, too.

(I’ve been there too)

Fearing the judgment of others is natural, normal, and no one escapes it entirely. Especially if you do unconventional work or have unusual life goals, this fear could be holding you back.

Here are six steps to avoid being paralyzed by the fear of being judged:

1. Don’t invite judgment: When we’re insecure about what we do, we might unwittingly nudge others to judge us for it. Like when you steer the conversation toward what you do for a living or nudge someone to ask you about your dreams for your future.
2. Stop judging yourself: When you stop judging yourself, people will miraculously find less to judge about you. Turn your focus outward to the people you serve, and away from your inner critic.
3. Don’t assume people are judgmental a-holes: Sometimes, what you interpret as judgment from someone is just a lack of understanding. Have you ever taken the time to explain to them what you do? Give them a chance to get it before dismissing their lackluster response as judgey.
4. Stop chasing people’s approval: OK, so maybe they *are* judging you. So what? You can’t change what people think about you, so don’t waste energy trying. Be true to yourself to achieve your true purpose.
5. Be happy: It’s hard for people to judge or criticize you if you’re happy, making money, and enjoying your life.
6. Get a power posse: Pull together a group of people you can hang with and never have to explain what you do for a living.

When you surround yourself with people who get what you do, let go of your own self judgment, and learn to love your life without others’ approval, you can let go of the fear and get on with sharing your special gifts with the world.

If you liked this article, here’s what you should read next:

Not all opinions are important

Want to identify your self doubts and things that are keeping you from living your ideal life? Book a free discovery call with me.