I found the answer to why you’re not giving your best
Often we think we’re doing our best, but we limit ourselves without realizing it. ‘The Big Leap’ by Gay Hendricks helped me recognize and overcome these limits and my hidden fears.
How the upper limit problem works
Each one of us has an inner thermostat setting that determines how much love, success, and creativity we allow ourselves to enjoy.
When we exceed our inner thermostat setting, we will often do something to sabotage ourselves, causing us to drop back into the old, familiar zone where we feel secure.
Our Zone of Genius is a set of activities we are uniquely suited to do. They draw upon our special gifts and strengths.
Blame
We mostly worry about things we have no control over. It’s useful, only if it concerns a topic we can actually do something about and if it leads to our taking positive action right away. All other worry is just upper limit noise, designed by our unconscious to keep us safely within our zone of excellence or competence.
Criticism
When we criticize something or ourselves, it usually doesn’t have anything to do with the thing we’re criticising. When we blame someone or something, we’re doing it because we’ve hit our Upper limit and are trying to retard the flow of positive energy.
Become a keen observer of critical statements that come out of your mouth or fly through your mind.
Deflecting
It keeps the positive energy from landing, being received, and being acknowledged.
When someone appreciates our work, we say “naah it wasn’t that nice”. We shut out positive energy completely from entering our system. Deflection keeps us from challenging ourselves, preventing us from expanding our capacity for experiencing positive energy.
So when someone says the equivalent of “nice shot” to us, we should pause for a moment to register the positive energy that’s being sent at us. Then thank the person who sent it our way.
The four hidden barriers
- Feeling fundamentally flawed — tells you to play it safe and small. So if you fail, you fail small.
- Disloyalty & Abandonment — based on being disloyal to your roots or leaving people behind from your past.
- Believing that more success brings a bigger burden — An old belief that you’re a burden can hold you back.
- The crime of outshining — “Dont shine too much, or you’ll make others feel bad or look bad.” very common for gifted or talented children
The hidden barriers seem true and real but are based on beliefs about ourselves that are neither true nor real, they’re based on fear and false belief.
Mouth-dropping moment 😯
Imagine squeezing a tennis ball in your hand, then releasing your grip and dropping the ball. We can dismiss the worry thoughts just like that.
One moment the thoughts have a grip on you; then you suddenly realize it’s you who have a grip on them. You release the grip, and the thoughts disappear.
The productive thing to do is to look for the positive new emergence that’s trying to happen. When you find yourself worrying, know that there is something positive trying to break through. Your worry thoughts, particularly if you find yourself recycling the same ones over and over, are a flag waving at you from your Zone of Genius. Something is trying to get your attention.
Newtonian Vs Einstein time
Think and analyze how you think or talk about time. The complaining about time statements sends the message that ‘time is out there’ and there isn’t enough of it ‘in here’.
Newtonian time: you’re either always running out of time or have too much of it. It says that there’s only a finite amount of time.
Einstein time: you’re the source of your time. You create the time you need.
No more rushing/ time pressure/ feeling exhausted. Take charge of the amount of time you have. Don’t let time own you. You are not time’s victim.
Stop using time as an excuse. You always have time because you’re the source of it. You can make as much of it as you want.
Discover your story
Almost all of us have a story about why we don’t access our genius. Ask yourself:
- What is my story?
- What is keeping me from feeling complete and whole?
- What important feelings am I not letting into my awareness?
Make sure you keep an attitude of wonder and play while learning about your Upper Limit behaviors.
The power of your commitment brings forth the means necessary for you to live in your Zone of Genius. If you make a powerful, ent — a vow that fe in the Zone of Genius — your journey will be blessed with uncommon good fortune at all twists. Commitment has that power.
Excited to take action? This book guided me on how to take the first step toward my side gig. I also wrote an article that might be helpful:
Want to identify your self doubts and things that are keeping you from living your ideal life? Book a free discovery call with me.
