Why Behavior Charts Don’t Work For Most Kids, And Here’s Why

In general, most behavior charts widely miss the mark of understanding a child’s behavior, meeting their needs, and teaching higher-functioning brain skills.

Behavior charts have been used for the past thirty years and seem like an effective way to reform behavior, however, research shows that they fail to meet the needs of most kids.

For some children, especially those who are visual learners and/or those with unique developmental abilities, using charts to track moods and rituals can be a tangible expression of what may otherwise seem abstract. However, the majority of behavior charts focus on reward and punishment, which can lead to feelings of shame. Commonly used charts include clip-downs, checkmarks, and traffic light charts, which categorize children as good (green), warning (yellow), or bad (red).

These tactics may achieve compliance, but is this really our goal? We cannot raise independent, assertive, and strong-willed adults if we force them to be passive, pliable, and obedient children. In general, most behavior charts widely miss the mark of understanding a child’s behavior, meeting their needs, and teaching higher-functioning brain skills.

Four Ways Behavior Charts Are Ineffective

• They fail to get underneath the behavior. When a child “misbehaves” and is asked to clip their name from green to red, typically one of two outcomes occur. The child temporarily ceases the undesired behavior or they hide it. While on the surface it may feel like the immediate problem has stopped, behavior charts prevent us from grasping the underlying reason for the child’s actions. For example, a child who consistently exhibits disruptive behavior may be struggling with anxiety or trauma, and simply punishing them for their behavior may exacerbate these underlying issues.
• They enforce short-term obedience instead of long-term learning and change. Behavior charts teach children that mistakes are unsafe and those who do not follow the rules and directions will be punished. While the use of fear and shame may create compliant children in the short term, it fails to actually teach the skills we are asking of our children which is to notice, name, and share their emotions, and manage their bodies.
• They focus on external motivation. One common thread that binds most behavioral management charts and systems is that they operate on extrinsic motivation rather than intrinsic motivation. Intrinsic motivation refers to the internal desire to engage in a behavior because it is inherently satisfying or enjoyable, while extrinsic motivation refers to the desire to engage in a behavior in order to obtain a reward or avoid a punishment. While extrinsic motivation can be effective in the short term, research suggests that it can actually undermine intrinsic motivation in the long term. We want our children to share because they find it intrinsically valuable, not because they got a sticker or fear a time-out.
• They create separation. Punishments and rewards can create dissonance in homes and schools, creating a culture where children with consistent positive behavior are resented by their siblings/peers, and those who struggle with behavior are defined by it. So much so, that the child labeled “bad” often begins to lean into that role and accept this as their identity. Have you noticed that most of the time the child who is on red today is the same one who was on red yesterday and the day before, and is likely to be on red all year long?

Let’s take a closer look at how behavior charts affect both the compliant and the defiant or strong-willed child:

Behavior Charts And The Compliant Child

Say you have a compliant child who on the surface sits still, listens attentively, and her name is always on the top of the green traffic light chart. You may think behavior charts work well for her, right? Well, it depends on your definition of “works.”

While behavior charts tend to reward children who are already cooperative and have regulation skills, they may also be a disservice. Children who are repeatedly praised for good behavior may begin to feel like they are only valued when they behave in a certain way, which can erode their self-esteem and sense of self-worth.

This emphasis on good behavior can also create anxiety in children who strive to maintain this positive image, fearing the consequences of being seen as imperfect or making a mistake, or one day finding their name on the dreaded red. They may even develop a deep-seated fear of being labeled bad. As a result, behavioral management systems can rob children of their confidence and voice, leaving them hesitant to question authority figures or speak up when something doesn’t feel right to them. Sometimes, so much mental energy is encompassed by fear and compliance, that it leaves little energy for the child to focus on the emotional, behavioral, or academic lesson that is being taught.

Behavior Charts And The Defiant Child

Now, imagine being called out to publicly move your name from the good to the bad slot.

Shame not only increases our heartbeats, but it increases stress and anxiety, too. This negative reinforcement confirms a child’s worst fears — that they are inherently bad, misunderstood, or unaccepted.

Children who consistently receive negative consequences may feel shame, embarrassment, or anger, which can lead to disengagement and withdrawal from the learning or social environment. These charts tend to disincentivize the very children they are intended to motivate, namely strong-willed children and/or children who lack the social-emotional skills necessary to meet the desired behavior being monitored by the chart.

Emotional punishment is just as detrimental to the developing brain as physical pain. For children who are still forming their capacity for impulse control, problem-solving, reasoning, empathy, and personal insight — and especially for children who have experienced any level of trauma — behavior management charts can be traumatizing and send a child further into the fight, flight, freeze, fawn modes that are wired for survival and safety.

What To Do Instead Of Behavior Charts

As parents and educators, we can choose to become a figure of empathy rather than one of judgment, recognizing challenging behavior as an unmet need or lagging skill. The best way to reform behavior is to model and teach that of which we are asking. When mistakes become safe, we help strengthen the parts of the brain responsible for emotional regulation.

The goal is to meet each child where they are in a ritualistic and playful way to make connection a habit. When we do this, it sends the message to our children that they are not bad but rather they are feeling bad and that they are in need.

By helping children notice and understand their emotions and behaviors in healthy ways, we inspire intrinsic motivation and nurture their brain development.

Looking for more resources, tips, and guidance? Click here.