The True Nature of Coaching

Parshawn Beheshtian
3 min readApr 4, 2023

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Photo by Chris Flexen on Unsplash

Coaching is an art form that has been present since Ancient Greece, where Socrates employed question thinking to facilitate growth and learning among his students. Over time, coaching has grown to encompass a diverse range of fields, such as sports, business, and personal development. However, the widespread use of coaching has resulted in misconceptions about what it truly entails, causing it to deviate from its authentic purpose in the eyes of the external world. In today’s world, where we rely more on external sources of information than our internal awareness, coaching has become a crucial need. Therefore, this paper seeks to provide clarity on the concept of coaching by exploring what coaching is not, followed by delving into its core principles and examining its ultimate goal of helping individuals reach their full potential.

To fully understand the nature of coaching, it is important to clarify what coaching is not and dispel common misconceptions surrounding this practice. At its core, coaching is not some form of guru magic that offers quick-fix solutions to life’s challenges, nor is it therapy or counseling, which typically addresses past traumas or mental health issues. Coaching is also not consulting, which involves experts providing solutions to specific problems, nor is it teaching or training, which focuses on imparting knowledge or skills to individuals or groups. Above all, coaching is not a place for diagnosis or treatment of mental health disorders, giving advice, or imposing an expert-learner relationship.

By encouraging self-awareness and exploration, rather than offering advice, coaches help their coachees step into their authentic power. The coach leads with genuine curiosity and asks thought-provoking questions that inspire the coachee to experience self-awareness, NOT ADVICE. Merely telling someone what to do will not help them experience and learn for themselves. This tendency to seek advice is a common problem today because we are afraid to explore our inner truth. Advice is simply a projection of the other person’s experiences, which does not help us learn from our own unique experiences. If we rely on someone else’s perspective, we miss out on the opportunity to experience our own lives authentically.

Through coaching, individuals can develop a deep understanding of themselves and their unique strengths, challenges, and aspirations. Coaching is a relationship between the coach and coachee(s), where the coach provides a safe space for the coachee to explore their innermost selves. Questions are crucial in this process as they allow individuals to experience themselves through their awareness of what is true to them. By asking thought-provoking questions, coaches encourage their coachees to explore their inner truth and connect with their heart’s desires to live authentically. We often have a difficult time trusting our hearts due to the stories we have created to avoid feeling hurt from past experiences. Coaches help coachees find their own answers and clarify their goals, values, and beliefs. This process empowers coachees to take responsibility for their lives and become more self-reliant. Both coach and coachee must actively participate and commit to the interactive process of coaching.

It’s important to note that coaching is not a one-size-fits-all solution, but rather a personalized approach to help individuals achieve their desired outcomes. Coaches use various techniques and tools, such as active listening, open-ended questioning, and goal setting, to help the coachee gain insight, explore possibilities, and take action. The coach acts as a facilitator, providing a non-judgmental and supportive environment for the coachee to explore their thoughts and feelings.

Ultimately, we are all in the process of moving from where we are to where we want to be, and coaching can provide us with clarity and guidance on how to get there. Coaching applies to all aspects of life, including career, school, physical and mental health, relationships, etc. It is all the same because it involves YOU, YOUR unique perspective, and YOUR authentic self-expression.

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Parshawn Beheshtian

Transformational Coach helping the world live authentically