How to identify an adulterous wife

Many a times I get questions from different affected men about how to identify an adulterous wife. Some unmarried men wants to know how to know about a cruel woman beforehand. Whereas cruelty and adultery are two different things and the signs are also different but some of the signs can be matched.

To identify an adulterous woman one needs to have good eyes and ears and a sixth sense that normally women claim to have. Also nowadays moral values of people are so degraded that many qualities that were not acceptable a few years back have become acceptable to today’s youth. For example, today’s youth are very open to live-in relations and break up. Rather they want to celebrate break up a grand way and move on in life. Sticking to one girl / boy friend is considered passe’ nowadays. Those who do that are considered losers. Premarital sex is no issue for most of the youth and both young girls and boys just want to enjoy sex and hence they get intimate even over a dinner. This sexual revolution is largely possible because of revolution in contraceptive methods and removing the taboo on sex and single mother concepts. Also in most cases the boys have to bear the burnt of maintaining the children they father or even did not (in adultery cases). So girls can engage in sexual encounter very often and even without any protection.

To understand any such potential woman we need to understand the psyche that works in adultery. It is the desire to experiment. Experiment new things in life. Now the way sexual attraction works in these two genders are different. Men get attracted to women easily by their physical beauty, they do not want to consider other things that easily. Whereas a girl’s sexuality works very differently and it is more complex. When their was stigma associated to premarital sex, premarital pregnancy, abortion, sex outside marriage, single parenthood we did not experience so many adultery cases. But today things have changed a lot.

Now let me tell you that if your spouse had many premarital sexual relations and you get concrete proofs of all those relations after your marriage you will not have any legal recourse. So you just need to forget everything. But it is better to avoid the girls who you know of having many sexual relations for your own marriage. It may be fun during premarital days, but it is extremely dangerous after marriage. In most of the cases, these lead to either suicide or murder or both. Even if the moral values of both the spouse are same, because you really don’t want to run a prostitution racket from your home. Someone who was addicted to sex before marriage is likely to lose control again and get into adultery.

Now it may sometime happen that your wife initially was truly faithful to you and your family. But over the years she may get into some adulterous relation or you may marry a girl who already had a steady boyfriend. Nowadays since boys and girls mingle freely among them, the line of control of friendship and ‘sex-buddy‘ship is blurred. You never know when a girl is just chatting with a male friend in her closed room, or when they are getting physical.

When you live with a woman under one roof, you will always get those signals of your wife being attracted to other men. Some of the signs to look out for are –

  1. When she talk over phone for long time — You need to observe the trend, mark her words, expressions. It may so happen that she is just sitting in front of you and chatting with his male friend and tell you that she is chatting with her female friend. Now you might be thinking that these happen only secretly, but it may also happen openly in front of your eyes when they are more powerful than you. Id her father has lot of contacts, if they know our family laws a lot, if they are more influential than you, If you have already seen many other such manipulation attitude before she will take these calls in front of you. Now the discussion or sometime the voice from other side will tell you whether it is a girl or a boy. Don’t be too much picky initially. Just show as if you don’t care as it is better to just avoid these long calls for a few days while you just keep an eye on her but don’t tell her that you are doing so. If you are too much curious, you may just ask casually but never make it sound like suspicion. Then you start showing irritation and ask her not to do that when you are around, as you two are not having ‘Quality’ time together. If you are paying her mobile bills you will know whether her talk time is increased. She may tell you stories about how ill or in how much difficulty one of her family member or friend is but you should know what to believe and what not. Just make a call to them to express your concern as well to understand what the other side is saying. Make some points in your mind and verify them. Also if she laughs, grins etc while talking, you know it can’t be that the other person is in danger.
  2. When the call comes at any hour of the day — Observe if the calls come only at one particular time of the day or just any part of the day. To understand this, just change your own schedule all of a sudden, take sudden leave from office, change your working hours suddenly, come back during lunch or may be earlier than usual time. Never, I repeat never tell the reason to her. Just observe. You may be completely wrong in your suspicion. So wait. Patience is the key. Men / boys are very restless, they get restless when they are into relationship with someone else’s wife. So observe the trend.

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