First-Time Woes: Part 2
If you have missed out Part 1, here’s the link: https://medium.com/@parvthymohan/first-time-woes-part-1-22bf4bcc6555
I understand how hard it’d have been for my friends who were hostelers in college to cope up with it initially. Everybody who has moved out (‘been there, done that!’ folks) would agree with this,
Moving out is a lot about realizations!
It throws light on how beautiful souls your parents were, how much they struggled to see you happy and well in all terms. It’s a truth you hardly cared to acknowledge, when you stayed cozy inside the comfort zone they had built for you, out of their sweat. Now, you are the man on the spot. You have to take timely decisions, lest you’ll land in trouble. You can’t pass on your responsibility to someone, nor can you expect someone to bear the consequences with you. Haha!
On a funnier note, moving out even makes you pay for the sins you did to your parents. It’s no belief, but rather an inference of my observations whenever I dealt with a break-down. Every time you feel left out in a gang, you think of times you had avoided your parents considering them boring. Every other time you find your room messy, you realize how much effort Amma took to keep every corner of the house shining. Every time you have to walk alone to buy something you needed because there wasn’t anyone to accompany you, you count the number of times your family offered you good food and outings, a couple of which you had turned down for trivial reasons. Every time you compromise your wish, you remember instances when your parents gave in for your tantrums to make you happier. Even then you blamed them for minor discomforts. Sigh! And, in my case, every time I get fed up walking and just feel like returning but nobody else wants to, I realize how strenuous it’d have been for my 60+-year-old Amma, whenever I wanted her to accompany me walking.
Now I accept why some of my friends loathe weekends and find Mondays rosy! Also, I get it why sister-in-law whined over weekend laundry tasks. Sigh! Well, for me Sundays existed only for lounging around, laundry and lamenting!
I noticed how easily I lost temper when taps opened to noodle-thin water that suggested an impending event of water supply interruption. I am yet to come to terms with the time and peace it costs me.
By the way, we learned not to keep our doors ajar for you don’t know when our dear little friend would want to visit us. Once he showed up, it scared the heck out of us. I wonder if he got upset when we screamed back at him! Thanks to our neighbors for the accommodation that night! I think he still likes us! The occasional squeaks down the pipe ducts mean that, don’t they?
Did you ever want to start a business and churn out money from it? Then, start a Paying Guest accommodation facility! Sometimes, I have wondered how anyone could construct a PG facility in such a small piece of land. It is a lucrative business, folks! But make sure you have no humanitarian concern left in you before you do this. Recently, I was surprised when the PG-walas initiated a lightning cleaning activity. It was the sign of an inspection nearing, else they wouldn’t have worked this hard! LOL! And, one ought to know that money is powerful. For the ‘hardly-working’ care-taker of the PG, you exist only when it’s time to pay the rent. He makes his presence in the first week of every month to collect money. Suddenly, the otherwise-don’t-care-people, care to send you reminders to pay the bills! It makes you feel wanted, at least for a day or two. Sigh!
Do you believe in ‘see no evil, hear no evil and speak no evil’? Well, today we don’t see, hear, speak anything at all in the real world!
Rather, we find our pleasures (sinister or not) in the virtual world.
It’s a tad exaggerated. But, let me be honest! I could find a considerable drop in mental health when I moved from home to PG. Long deep talks became rare, for we had our eyes and heart glued to smart devices, so absorbed in a virtual world. Maybe we found the zenith of happiness in them or what, I don’t know!
Over time, we learned how to optimize chores and survive mountains of laundry. Meanwhile, Amma who has never owned a smartphone learned to text me! It felt like a baby’s first words to the parents. Once they even sent me a photo of a google search result on another phone carefully balanced on the dining table, just because they weren’t aware of the option to take a screenshot in their phones. Is there a better manifestation of love?
Is there a better way of showing, ‘where there is a will, there is a way’?
It’s all a matter of adaptation. Some do it faster, just that!
