I have a similar technique, but instead of point 2 I use “pet the dragons”. It is a term I learned from my favourite poet (Sándor Weöres). I usuall say something like “I accept this chaos, it is life itself and it’s OK, will not hurt me”. And then I wait for the fog to clear.
It takes courage to write about these things openly, thank you. And it’s hard to raise a family, build a career, manage finances and build a strong marriage in the same time. In Finland these years are called the “traffic jam years” (“ruuhkavuodet”).