Chastity Q2

Ben Franklin’s 13 Virtues: Week 12, Q2

Chastity: “rarely use venery but for health or offspring. Never to dullness, weakness or the injury of your own or another’s peace or reputation.

Personal notes:

  • This week is a decade too late;
  • It’s the most difficult week to write about publicly;
  • Focus on “health” and/or “offspring,” depending on what the boss says.

We went on vacation with family last week and, in true family vacation fashion, space was at a premium. Rooms overflowed with bodies big and small, wine bottles battled chocolate doughnuts for counter space, and 6 cousins watched TV in a gaggle of arms, legs and feet across a brown couch built for 3. The week was crowded, fantastic, and inevitably chaste.

Sleeping four to a room quickly crowds out intimacy, no surprise, but no matter. Each night our bedroom stirred with children flipping in their beds. Their soft breathing, their proximity, and their tiny shuffles were all a comfort; a comfort transcending the loud, sweaty, and inebriated vacations of old.

Life is a far cry from past spring breaks where wild Friday night romps rolled into bleary Saturday afternoons. Sex is not as often now, we’re most excited about sleep, but sex is more intimate, sober, and healthy. That’s not to say this week is unimportant, certainly not; in fact, our vacation hammers home how important this week is.

This week is not about being chaste, but being faithful. There is considerable cost to sex and there is much to lose: family, happiness, love. The price is too high. “Rarely use venery but for health or offspring” seems a bargain in comparison.

Next Week

Ben Franklin’s 13 Virtues: Week 13, Q2

Humility: “Imitate Jesus and Socrates

Personal notes:

  • Think about others;
  • Think about where we are;
  • Find happiness here.

Congratulations! This is our half way point; it’s amazing how quickly it goes. After 6 months, we return to Humility — the keystone virtue. This week, think about Humility: read about it, explore it, practice it; there is value here.

Originally published at on August 1, 2016.