Jim, I have been a Hospice RN for more than 14 years. Although There is nothing I can ever say to sooth one’s pain and grief, I can tell you this my friend, to expect miracles to happen. Not always the miracles we want or wish for but in the spiritual realm. I have seen wounded emotions healed and great peace come upon families. Try to rest, place yourself in your higher powers arms. Allow that comfort. like a healing balm, to embrace you, to engulf you. Allow yourself to grieve with no restriction, no rules about how to grieve. Keep your heart and eyes open. Wounds may heal but scars remain. We must not try to escape them. Every once in a while we have to touch our scars to remember where we came from. My scars are part of who I am and why I write. We can touch each other’s scars to know we are all the same, to reassure those with fresh wounds that they will heal. Though that hole in your heart has reopened, your heart continues to beat. You are alive, for your children and grandchildren, for your children’s mother who is your friend, for yourself and all who you love. The whole in your heart is larger now than before. It is proportional to how much we love. If you ever need to talk, let me know. I’ll be praying for you and your family.