Cool aid in the post-viral world.
After this has dissipated after the virus has burnt itself out, or whatever the outcome, I keep thinking about how us gay guys who have been dancing with the devil for’ the last 30 years, what is going to happen to us? Is there going to be a place in this post-viral world for us.?
You know, we have had 3o years of HIV dictating the way we love and live our lives, and we were just getting over that. We were starting to crush HIV. So many lives scared by HIV, the absolute terror and fear of it had many just going asexual.
There was this healing taking place, a slow realization and acceptance within our ranks. It used to be this those that are Positive and those that are not.
And now the more I think about intimacy, how we need touch, and how we need love, and how much I miss the taste of a man’s skin. What is it going to do to us.? This fear of touching another person.
I was on the big cam to cam sites last night, have you ever heard the sound of 100 worried men who seem to be staring down the barrel of a gun, looking for just a small bit of attention, a taste of what intimacy used to be. That sound was distorted and warped because of the lag, the wap, wap, wap, like a beating drum, a far off conversation garbled and punctuated with a clatter of fingers on a keyboard. What is the new type of intimacy going to be? Is this going to be our new intimacy?
Are we going to have to reclassify all gay porn that is produced from now on as a type of extreme semi snuff porn? Or are we going to be fast-forwarded into the age of mind sex? I am so dualistic on this .. I love the fact that we are forced to face ourselves, live with the choices we make. In the past, we could just follow along with the sheep, the sheep will always be in good hands. But not any more, with so many contradictions, and so many choices and so much information, our choices are our own. And if we made the wrong ones.. well… maybe we get to try again, and the ones that make those correct decisions, what then?
To the couples out there, I admit I am a bit jealous. But you are both going to have to be and think and do as one unit, but with two minds. And I have not wanted to think about the poor straight people. We faced death, we have seen friends die around us, we know the sacrifices, we lived through it. And this is their first time…
So maybe that’s going to be our intimacy, helping the straights deal with things.?
Imagine how those Pidgeons in the city centres around are feeling, generations of them, they have evolved and grown with our cities, relying on us for food, I bet they are pecking around at the same piece of dirt they did yesterday. And the stray cats and rats they are losing their fear, and guess who is on the menu. Those who can adapt to survive, and those who stubbornly dig their heels in, their bones will become the foundation and folklore for future generations.
****Climbs off Soapbox,
Washes his hands,
**** Starts handing out cool-aid,
“Drink up bitches, the space ship is coming “