An Exhaustive, Pretty Accurate Review of Alinea To-GoI live in Chicago, a city known for its incredible food. For example, every morning when I step on the train, I’m handed a dozen hot dogs…May 26, 2020May 26, 2020
An Exhaustive, Pretty Accurate Recap of “Cats”They say that, in times of extreme duress, human beings are capable of incredible things. Mothers can lift entire 2-ton cars off of their…Jan 12, 2020Jan 12, 2020
On New Year’s, FriendshFour years ago, I was supposed to host a New Year’s Eve party. The problem was, I was also just getting over a case of pneumonia (don’t…Dec 31, 20191Dec 31, 20191
Answers to My Extended Family’s Burning Questions About “How Comedy is Going”Hello, extended family members and their significant others that I’ll refer to only as “that one guy…Jared, I think it was???” for the…Dec 16, 20191Dec 16, 20191
Published inThe Belladonna ComedyPotential Roles I Could Play In Your Upcoming HeistI bring a lot to the table!Nov 14, 2019Nov 14, 2019
An Exhaustive, Pretty Accurate Recap of “Last Christmas”Let me tell you exactly how the movie “Last Christmas” came to be. (This is based on actual true events, as I assume they happened.)Nov 13, 2019Nov 13, 2019
I Wasn’t Caroline Calloway, But I Also Had a Shitty Friend OnceA lot of buzz is flying around the internet this week about the Caroline Calloway/Natalie Beach drama, and I just want to also take this…Sep 12, 2019Sep 12, 2019
The Democratic Candidates Described Like Characters from the Babysitter’s ClubJoe Biden: Joey sees himself as the president of the club ever since his bestie Barack moved away, even though sometimes Joey’s talking…Sep 12, 2019Sep 12, 2019