The Financial Advice I Give to My College-Aged Kids Is Really for Myself
Some fathers tell dad jokes; I prefer to give dad advice (dadvice for short). As a former CFO and retiree at 50, I feel I have sound guidance to offer my sons in the area of money matters. Sadly, my pearls of wisdom tend to elicit the same reactions as bad puns do: groans and eye-rolls. I admit I can drone on, losing my audience at “When I was your age…”
But with both kids now in college — where they’re forming daily, potentially lifelong habits — my paternal instincts compel me to speak up. This time, though, I dismount my high horse. I reflect on my own college days, remembering the apprehension I felt opening my first bank account and having to pay for expenses. I recall the unease of graduating with an MBA in one hand and $52,000 of debt in the other. Instead of emphasizing how I’ve been-there-done-that, I focus today on simply being there for my children as they embark upon their financial journeys.
Besides, I’m still a student myself—though admittedly more so with my health than my wealth. In the throes of my career, I neglected my body and mind, leaving me with physical and mental debt that I’m paying back to this day. If only I had spent my carefree collegiate days running the campus loop and learning to eat properly! Indeed, the magic of compounding applies not just to money. I wonder differently how my 30s and 40s would have played out if I had invested earlier in my health.
Of course, as I tell my sons, it’s never too late to start taking care of yourself. The following dadvice I offer thus serves a dual purpose: to help them start off on the right foot and to remind me of the work I have left to do.
Beware hidden costs
I caution my sons, “Fees and surcharges lurk everywhere. Understand the upfront and recurring costs of a service, bank account, or investment. Avoid mindlessly clicking through a purchase; know what you’re committing to pay.”
Prone to go on autopilot myself, I’m guilty of letting hidden costs erode my health. For example, I often scroll on my phone or hunch over my laptop for hours on end, only later noticing the eyestrain and neck pain. Fortunately, daily walks and runs help me to escape screens and break out of the fog. With my eating, I value the convenience of prepackaged foods, but I need only peek at the labels to identify a litany of unhealthy ingredients. By boosting my intake of fresh vegetables and meat, I am more in control over what I put in my body. As a CFO I was a hawk with costs; I must now apply this same vigilance to my daily activities and diet.
Take advantage of discounts, while keeping an eye on spend
“Check out all the discounts offered to college students. But keep in mind that the marketers’ goal is to get their hooks in you. Ultimately, only buy what you really need; you save the most—100%—when you don’t spend at all.”
Of course, marketers are targeting me, too. In my quest to stay fit, I’m drawn to the latest technology and gear, my eyes sometimes getting bigger than my wallet. Contrary to popular belief, the sport of running can get expensive, fast! So I seek out retailers that offer loyalty programs and generous return policies. I scour for discount codes before I register for a race. Most importantly, I try to pause before pressing “buy,” asking myself one final time whether the item will truly benefit my performance.
Keep it simple and consistent, and automate good habits
“Store your wallet and valuables in the same place. Track your credit-card and payment-app spending on a consistent basis. Let’s start regularly investing some of your savings in low-cost index funds.”
Inertia often stands in the way of my fitness. On some days I can’t find my gear; on others, it’s motivation that’s missing. As a result, I turn to consistent, low-effort tactics to help me maintain my routine. I schedule workouts on my calendar, map out logistics ahead of time, and recruit running buddies to hold me accountable. To avoid delays getting out the door, I charge my devices and lay out my clothes the night before a long run. And when I’m not feeling it, I remind myself that staying active has myriad benefits (longevity, joy, lower healthcare costs, etc.) and that the first few steps of a run are typically all it takes to get my engine revving.
Spend intentionally…but also enjoy life
“Be frugal but don’t deny yourself of fun or nourishment. College is a unique time to meet people and experience new things. Just spend with intention.”
As someone with an intense personality, I tend to go all out to achieve my goals. But as I’ve learned with my training and weight-loss efforts, overly restricting myself isn’t sustainable. Fitness requires tradeoffs but not necessarily endless sacrifice. I’m discovering much can be gained simply by being more conscious of what I consume and how I spend my time. Catching up with friends over a meal, for example, may result in more calories and less sleep but also a significant boost to my well-being. Over the years, I’ve loosened my grip on plans and learned to trust my gut. While I may never fully optimize my health, I gain peace in return.
While my college days are long gone, I can at least help my children find their footing and avoid mistakes I had made at their age. My younger son, Charlie, and I recently went to the bank to open a CD with an attractive interest rate. I advised my older son, Sam, on how to open a brokerage account and make his first investments. Harking back to the days as toddlers taking their first steps, they’re slightly unsteady—but I know, with both pride and wistfulness, they soon will no longer need my steady hand.
Visiting Sam at school one day, I asked if we could run a few laps together on the campus track. He had just started running, and I was excited to see how he was enjoying his new exercise regimen. As we jogged side by side, I rattled off one tip after another, while he remained mostly silent. Near the end, I challenged him to a sprint, anticipating a fierce challenge. It was no contest: as I pushed myself to the limit, Sam pulled away with ease. High-fiving me at the finish, he relished in beating his old man. I beamed back, joyous that I was the one learning that day.
Adapted from an essay originally published at https://fiscalfitnessguru.com.
