16 Things Merdie’s Tavern Owner Said to Terrorist

New York City bombing suspect, Ahmad Rahami, was found sleeping in the doorway of Merdie’s Tavern in Linden, New Jersey at 10:30 a.m. before local law enforcement took him into custody.

This is what the bar owner likely told him:

  1. “Buddy, if you’re gonna sleep in my doorway, you gotta buy a drink.”
  2. *picks up phone, “Yeah, spider just caught a fly.”
  3. “Rough one last night?”
  4. “Is that a terrorist in my doorway or are you just happy to see me?”
  5. “Do you mind if we take a selfie?” *takes selfie
  6. “Hair of the dog, am I right?”
  7. “I need to see some ID.”
  8. “Dude, if you’re gonna lay terror to the United States, you gotta buy a drink.”
  9. “Look at me. How many virgins am I holding up?”
  10. “This one’s on the house.”
  11. “We don’t start serving until 11:00 a.m…buuuuut I guess we can make an exception.”
  12. “Stride of pride, eh?”
  13. “What would Allah say?” *shakes head
  14. “Do you have a tab open?”
  15. “Get me the president. No? OK, how about CIA? FBI? OK, fine, just connect me with Linden PD. Sure, I’ll hold.”
  16. “Are you that terrorist guy?”