Science Says Post Photos of Yourself to Build Audience Repoir

So I met up with renowned portrait photographer, Talc Marmaduke, to see what we’d come up with

According to Talc, this was just too jokey, and if I wanted my audience to take me seriously, I had to take serious pictures.

So here I am with toilet paper tubes on my eyes. Once again, Talc had severe criticisms.

Talc said I could look intelligent if I drank some sort of beverage, but as I attempted to consume this water, I forgot how to swallow!

So Talc told me to show some emotion, but then he asked me if I’d just realized I’d crapped myself.

Finally, he was like, “Nothing else has worked. Guess we’re going to go with the old standby to get you some media attention, Patrick.”

Illuminati Symbolism.


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