Finding Neverland

By PeggySue Wells

Don’t let the things that matter most be at the mercy of the things that matter least. ~ Don Ward

In our busy world, we never seem to have enough time.

We can be ahead of our time.

We can be behind the times.

We race against time, arrive in the nick of time, and waste time. Biding time, we can have a heck of a time, catch someone in time, trust good things will happen all in good time, but rarely boast of having time on our hands. When the time is ripe, we wait for time to tell, and note what stands the test of time. We are shocked by those who two-time, and admire those that make it to the big time. Time flies, is of the essence, and is said to heal all wounds though with that I disagree which is fodder for another article.

Unlike money, which we can create, time is a limited commodity. Time cannot be recouped. Once the moment is away it is gone forever.

Time is a priceless commodity and while everyone receives the same 24 hours per day, those minutes appear to be far too short for parents — especially busy moms. Is it possible to have a peaceful and productive pace in your household?

The answer is a resounding yes. Here are investments that promise an abundant return.

Time Thieves

· Refuse invitations to pity parties. Feeling sorry for yourself and your circumstances steals your time and opportunity for a better today. People can only make you feel inferior with your permission. Though circumstances and the actions of others may be out of your control, your attitude and response is all yours. You are responsible for your own emotions.

· No more excuses. The victim mentality is characterized by justifications and explanations. Streamline your life and conversation by dropping excuses that no one believes anyway.

· Stop playing the blame game. Vent, cry, and acknowledge your pain to a counselor, compassionate friend, or your journal. Release your disappointment that circumstances and relationships did not turn out the way you had expected. Then lean into the welcoming arms of recovery. Move forward. Staying stuck is a time-sucker.

· People who are competitive, envious, exclusive, rescuing, smothering, or testing can slow you down. Move them to the outer circle of your friendships and buddy up with forward-thinking, positive people who encourage you to achieve your dreams.

· Healthy family traditions save time by eliminating drama and emotional upheavals.

Time Savers

· Grant yourself the gift of margin. When running from one obligation to another steals your peace, it is time to reconsider what is important to create a nurturing environment for your family. Cut out activities that are life-sucking rather than life-giving.

· Cultivate an attitude of gratitude. Abraham Lincoln said, “If you look for the worst in people you will surely find it.” It is just as easy to find the best in others. Negativity is a time vacuum.

· View challenges as an opportunity to excel.

· Give your crock-pot a name and toss in quick ingredients in the morning such as any cut of chicken — even still frozen — with any salad dressing or salsa. All day you can smile confidently knowing ‘Maria’ is cooking up something healthy and delicious for dinner.

· Use the message function on your phone. Some information can be communicated faster via message or text. Allow yourself to return calls when it is convenient for you and does not interfere with your family time.

· A place for everything and everything in its place. Smooth your days by parking keys, purse, shoes, coat, and mittens in a regular space where they can be found immediately.

· Schedule regular oil change and tire rotation for the car. This simple maintenance keeps your vehicle running longer and more efficient.

· Keep a shopping list and calendar on your phone that is easily updated and shared with family members, babysitters, and relatives.

· Double your workout results by cleaning house. A half hour three times per week vacuuming, mopping, washing windows and screens, and tidying the yard keeps your home pleasant and your body toned.

If you’re spinning in circles, be certain to add a dance step. ~ PeggySue Wells

Wynken, Blinken, and Nod

Sleep is a time multiplier. Studies prove that adequate sleep is essential for good emotional and physical health. An investment in good sleep habits facilitates good decision-making for the rest of the day. Rested and refreshed, we are less likely to overschedule and go through life harried, sick, and barely surviving, and more likely to thrive.

Here are ways to facilitate a peaceful end to the day and make time for restorative sleep.

With Children

· Days end pleasantly when bedtime is shrouded in routine. Because media stimulates the brain and delays sleep, turn off devices one hour before bedtime. Children begin to calm as they play board games, build with Legos, color, play with play dough, and read books.

· Regardless of your child’s behavior that day, snuggle and prayer time before going to sleep is essential to assure that your love is unconditional.

· Fill the tummy with healthy nutrition that will last the night. Serve a bedtime snack that is a combination of protein, carbs, and fat such as a serving of oatmeal with cream, half a tuna sandwich, peanut butter on a banana, or yogurt and granola.

· Utilize the soothing qualities of water with a before-bed bath.

· When those first teeth break through the tender gums, include brushing teeth in the bedtime routine. When your toddler reaches for the brush, let him hold it and chew on the bristles.

· Until your child is proficient at brushing, let him brush first and then bring the toothbrush to you so you can do a thorough follow-up. Sing a song as you brush a wiggly preschooler’s teeth. Your child will know the brushing is complete when the song ends.

Around age six or seven, when your child is proficient at brushing and flossing, turn the brushing over to your child. At the six-month check-up, the dental hygienist can confirm your brusher is covering the bases.

· Tuck your little one into bed by making him into a make-believe pizza. Imagine the bed is pizza crust. Clean and in pajamas, your child is the pepperoni. The first blanket is sauce, and the comforter is cheese. Our personal favorite is to make the child into a hot fudge sundae. The bed is the bowl, the child is the ice cream. The first blanket is the hot fudge, the next blanket is the whipped cream, and a kiss on the forehead is the cherry on top.

· Begin an appreciation for reading with a bedtime story. Read aloud one book for each year your child is old. If your child gets ready for bed in a timely fashion, add a book to read.

· Praying with my children as they went to bed kept their sleep nightmare free. I thanked God for the gift each child was in my life, and I listed a positive characteristic. “Thank you, God, for Hannah. She is a special gift to me and she takes good care of her pet.”

· Encourage your child to pray by telling God one grumbly thing and one thankful.

· Nightlights are a comfort and make it possible to easily check on your child in the night without stubbing your toe in the dark.

Sleep that is nurturing and nourishing physically, emotionally, and spiritually is quantitative. Not enough sleep actually is a time stealer because the quality of our awake hours is severely compromised.

Sufficient sleep

· Babies to one-year-olds require 12 to 15 hours daily.

· One to three-year-olds: 12 to 14 hours

· Four to six-year-olds: 10 to 12 hours

· Seven to 12-year-olds: 10 to 11 hours

· 13 to 18-year-olds: 8 to 9 hours

· Adults: 8 to 9 hours and the occasional nap

While short of a time machine it is impossible to add hours to the day, the best way to multiply our moments is to increase their quality. This is speedily accomplished through a positive attitude, wisely chosen and limited obligations, and investing in our health. Each of these three categories are necessary to be present in our own lives. And being present in the time and space where we are creates relationships and shared memories.

Have a fully present time today!

For You

Bonding With Your Child Through Boundaries by PeggySue Wells and June Hunt

Willpower Doesn’t Work by Benjamin Hardy

Why Forgiveness is the True St. Patrick’s Day Tradition by PeggySue Wells

For Your Best Relationships Ever, Avoid These Five Rs by PeggySue Wells