The Veil of Happiness: Unmasking the Act of Pretending to be Okay

F.s
3 min readOct 24, 2023

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"Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions." – Dalai Lama

Introduction

In an era where social media portrays a picture-perfect life and the societal demand for constant positivity pervades our consciousness, many of us often find ourselves trapped in the cycle of pretending to be okay. But is this façade of happiness truly beneficial, or does it mask a deeper problem, leading to suppressed emotions and potentially, mental health issues?

Unraveling the Act

Acknowledging the Pretense

The first step towards unmasking the act of pretending to be okay is to become self-aware. Often, we are so engrossed in maintaining our happy image that we fail to recognize our own emotional state. Hence, it’s crucial to pay attention to your actions, thoughts, and feelings. Be honest with yourself; if you’re not feeling happy, don’t deny it.

Understanding the Why

As you delve deeper into the act of pretending, try to comprehend why you’re doing it. Are you trying to hide your vulnerability? Are you striving to meet societal expectations of happiness and success? Or are you trying to protect your loved ones? Understanding the root cause of your pretense is the key to addressing the underlying issues and dealing with your discontentment.

The Myth of Perfection

Embracing Authenticity

The societal pressure of appearing perfect and happy all the time can lead to emotional distress. It’s important to understand that nobody is happy all the time and nobody leads a perfect life. Instead of pretending to be happy to please others, focus on being authentic with your feelings. The more you are honest with yourself and others about your feelings, the more you will find genuine happiness.

Understanding Unhappiness

It’s okay to be unhappy sometimes. Everyone goes through periods of unhappiness due to various life circumstances. However, the problem arises when we start denying these negative emotions. Suppressing negative emotions can lead to deeper emotional issues. Hence, it’s essential to express your negative emotions in healthy ways.

Taking the First Steps

Prioritizing Self-Care

Pretending to be happy is often a performance put on for the benefit of others. However, it’s crucial to prioritize your own well-being over pleasing others. Remember that it’s not your responsibility to meet others’ expectations. Being true to your feelings is more important.

Avoiding Comparisons

Comparing your happiness to others can lead to false expectations and discontentment. Remember, social media images are often a highlight reel of people’s lives and may not reflect their true emotional state. It’s essential to measure your happiness based on your terms and not get swayed by others’ portrayals.

Small Changes, Big Impact

Embrace Politeness Over Pretense

It’s not necessary to pretend to be happy just to meet societal or professional expectations. Instead, focus on being respectful and polite. Treat people around you with kindness, but don’t feel the pressure to be constantly cheerful or bubbly.

Savoring the Small Moments

Happiness is not always found in grand achievements or materialistic possessions. Sometimes, the key to happiness lies in the small, everyday moments. Instead of pretending to be happy, try to relax and let life unfold naturally. You might find more peace and contentment in simple moments like spending time with family or enjoying a quiet evening alone.

Seeking Help

Opening Up to Trusted People

If you’re feeling unhappy, it’s important to reach out to someone you trust. Sharing your feelings with a friend, family member, or professional can provide a sense of relief and validation.

Recognizing Depression

While temporary unhappiness is a part of life, prolonged periods of unhappiness could indicate depression. If you’ve been feeling unhappy for a long time, it’s advisable to seek professional help.

Professional Help

If you’re struggling to cope with your feelings, consider seeking professional help such as therapy or counseling. Mental health professionals can provide strategies and tools to help you deal with your

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F.s

"Life is a dream for the wise, a game for the fool, a comedy for the rich, a tragedy for the poor."